I think it says the lady from the church is doing the handovers, but it doesn't have to be. The only reason he did it is the lady wasn't available that day. You are right she absolutely should be. It's ridiculous she's not doing the handovers herself, she's no victim of anything, I wonder if she can't look me in the eyes after what she's done? Don't know, don't care. My focus is my little one.
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Update on my case
- Thread starter winger
- Start date
Hey I wanted to do an update on how the Section 7 went yesterday.
It couldn't have gone better.
So I was reading with my daughter, and there was a knock on the door, so I answer it and it's the Cafcass lady and the other lady with her.
Immediately it was great, albeit a bit odd to have 2 people you don't know in your home, 'watching' your daughter and you. They asked where do you want us? So I said we were just reading, so they said that's great we'll come and do that. They were mainly quiet and letting me and my daughter carry on, my daughter looking at them sometimes wondering who they were and why they were looking at us
I kept it light-hearted and said, Who's this? Is this XXXX, and XXXX? They joined in with the book, which was nice. I just read it as I always do, I love reading to my daughter and I'm quite funny and silly with it, they seemed to like this too! Afterward the main lady commented that it's obvious we have always done that, it was very natural, she said children can't lie. She said that my ex said, when she went to see her, that our daughter's vocabulary was so good because me and ex have always spoken to her normally, not in a baby way, so that was good.
I wanted to show us, being us, and our bond and relationship, not forced or trying overly hard, but naturally what we do. We chased each other around the house, her on her scuttle bug and me chasing her, we played hide and seek which is our new thing that she has learned in the last couple of times being together. She hides, I count, I pretend I can't see her, then I burst into surprise when she comes out of her hiding place! Then I hide and she comes to find me. This was all in front of the 2 ladies. They stayed sat in the lounge, they didn't wander around or look in drawers, like other people have said they experienced.
They commented on how nice the pictures I had of my daughter were, and I told them the stories behind them, as well as special things that meant a lot and the meaning.
I offered to make them tea/coffee, after my daughter had made us all pretend tea, which they liked. They watched us interacting, which is really important, they want to see the bond you have and the relationship. I said to them they were welcome to come through if they wanted to, which they did, and saw the dining room and kitchen. It was n ice that they didn't just walk around the house, they were respectful. They asked about my daughter's bedroom and would it be ok to see it, which I said yes ofcourse, so we all went upstairs, my daughter went first and showed us the way, she went into daddy's room first and bounced on the bed, we both did, again in front of these two ladies who found it very funny.
I think it is important to not let having someone you don't know in your house, watching you and your child, stop you from being you. You need to pretend it's just you and your child, and be naturally yourself with them, I hope that makes sense. It shouldn't be fake or rehearsed.
We went into my daughter's room, she played and we bounced on her bed, we all chatted, they said it's a big room. I said to them I am getting her a new bed, and this one is going. They were pleased with everything.
When we were downstairs again they said they'd go now and leave us to our day, I said 'Ok, thanks. I hope everything was ok' and the main lady said 'I'm not one for keeping things to myself, and then putting it in the report, I would say if there was anything. But I'm happy with everything'.
So that's great and I said thank you, it means a lot. She said she would come round again for us to chat, a day when my daughter isn't here.
The whole thing went very well and was positive. I'm really pleased it was at home because it meant we could just be us at home. I think it comes across better.
The advice I would give is to be natural, calm, and don't try too hard, just be yourself with your child, they will see through anything that isn't real I think, because they do this every day. Try and build rapport, just chat with them if you can, about how proud you are of your child, and what you have done that day. What they like to eat, why, how you introduced them to different foods etc.
It couldn't have gone better.
So I was reading with my daughter, and there was a knock on the door, so I answer it and it's the Cafcass lady and the other lady with her.
Immediately it was great, albeit a bit odd to have 2 people you don't know in your home, 'watching' your daughter and you. They asked where do you want us? So I said we were just reading, so they said that's great we'll come and do that. They were mainly quiet and letting me and my daughter carry on, my daughter looking at them sometimes wondering who they were and why they were looking at us
I kept it light-hearted and said, Who's this? Is this XXXX, and XXXX? They joined in with the book, which was nice. I just read it as I always do, I love reading to my daughter and I'm quite funny and silly with it, they seemed to like this too! Afterward the main lady commented that it's obvious we have always done that, it was very natural, she said children can't lie. She said that my ex said, when she went to see her, that our daughter's vocabulary was so good because me and ex have always spoken to her normally, not in a baby way, so that was good.I wanted to show us, being us, and our bond and relationship, not forced or trying overly hard, but naturally what we do. We chased each other around the house, her on her scuttle bug and me chasing her, we played hide and seek which is our new thing that she has learned in the last couple of times being together. She hides, I count, I pretend I can't see her, then I burst into surprise when she comes out of her hiding place! Then I hide and she comes to find me. This was all in front of the 2 ladies. They stayed sat in the lounge, they didn't wander around or look in drawers, like other people have said they experienced.
They commented on how nice the pictures I had of my daughter were, and I told them the stories behind them, as well as special things that meant a lot and the meaning.
I offered to make them tea/coffee, after my daughter had made us all pretend tea, which they liked. They watched us interacting, which is really important, they want to see the bond you have and the relationship. I said to them they were welcome to come through if they wanted to, which they did, and saw the dining room and kitchen. It was n ice that they didn't just walk around the house, they were respectful. They asked about my daughter's bedroom and would it be ok to see it, which I said yes ofcourse, so we all went upstairs, my daughter went first and showed us the way, she went into daddy's room first and bounced on the bed, we both did, again in front of these two ladies who found it very funny.
I think it is important to not let having someone you don't know in your house, watching you and your child, stop you from being you. You need to pretend it's just you and your child, and be naturally yourself with them, I hope that makes sense. It shouldn't be fake or rehearsed.
We went into my daughter's room, she played and we bounced on her bed, we all chatted, they said it's a big room. I said to them I am getting her a new bed, and this one is going. They were pleased with everything.
When we were downstairs again they said they'd go now and leave us to our day, I said 'Ok, thanks. I hope everything was ok' and the main lady said 'I'm not one for keeping things to myself, and then putting it in the report, I would say if there was anything. But I'm happy with everything'.
So that's great and I said thank you, it means a lot. She said she would come round again for us to chat, a day when my daughter isn't here.
The whole thing went very well and was positive. I'm really pleased it was at home because it meant we could just be us at home. I think it comes across better.
The advice I would give is to be natural, calm, and don't try too hard, just be yourself with your child, they will see through anything that isn't real I think, because they do this every day. Try and build rapport, just chat with them if you can, about how proud you are of your child, and what you have done that day. What they like to eat, why, how you introduced them to different foods etc.
Well done mate.
Really positive.
I would be appalled if they ever looked through drawers.
Surely they can't be doing that?
Really positive.
I would be appalled if they ever looked through drawers.
Surely they can't be doing that?
Fantastic! 
Chuffed it went well
Chuffed it went well
That’s amazing news wingerHey I wanted to do an update on how the Section 7 went yesterday.
It couldn't have gone better.
So I was reading with my daughter, and there was a knock on the door, so I answer it and it's the Cafcass lady and the other lady with her.
Immediately it was great, albeit a bit odd to have 2 people you don't know in your home, 'watching' your daughter and you. They asked where do you want us? So I said we were just reading, so they said that's great we'll come and do that. They were mainly quiet and letting me and my daughter carry on, my daughter looking at them sometimes wondering who they were and why they were looking at us
I wanted to show us, being us, and our bond and relationship, not forced or trying overly hard, but naturally what we do. We chased each other around the house, her on her scuttle bug and me chasing her, we played hide and seek which is our new thing that she has learned in the last couple of times being together. She hides, I count, I pretend I can't see her, then I burst into surprise when she comes out of her hiding place! Then I hide and she comes to find me. This was all in front of the 2 ladies. They stayed sat in the lounge, they didn't wander around or look in drawers, like other people have said they experienced.
They commented on how nice the pictures I had of my daughter were, and I told them the stories behind them, as well as special things that meant a lot and the meaning.
I offered to make them tea/coffee, after my daughter had made us all pretend tea, which they liked. They watched us interacting, which is really important, they want to see the bond you have and the relationship. I said to them they were welcome to come through if they wanted to, which they did, and saw the dining room and kitchen. It was n ice that they didn't just walk around the house, they were respectful. They asked about my daughter's bedroom and would it be ok to see it, which I said yes ofcourse, so we all went upstairs, my daughter went first and showed us the way, she went into daddy's room first and bounced on the bed, we both did, again in front of these two ladies who found it very funny.
I think it is important to not let having someone you don't know in your house, watching you and your child, stop you from being you. You need to pretend it's just you and your child, and be naturally yourself with them, I hope that makes sense. It shouldn't be fake or rehearsed.
We went into my daughter's room, she played and we bounced on her bed, we all chatted, they said it's a big room. I said to them I am getting her a new bed, and this one is going. They were pleased with everything.
When we were downstairs again they said they'd go now and leave us to our day, I said 'Ok, thanks. I hope everything was ok' and the main lady said 'I'm not one for keeping things to myself, and then putting it in the report, I would say if there was anything. But I'm happy with everything'.
So that's great and I said thank you, it means a lot. She said she would come round again for us to chat, a day when my daughter isn't here.
The whole thing went very well and was positive. I'm really pleased it was at home because it meant we could just be us at home. I think it comes across better.
The advice I would give is to be natural, calm, and don't try too hard, just be yourself with your child, they will see through anything that isn't real I think, because they do this every day. Try and build rapport, just chat with them if you can, about how proud you are of your child, and what you have done that day. What they like to eat, why, how you introduced them to different foods etc.
.I’m made up for you mate
And that is why they should always see you with your child.Hey everyone I've been away for a few days and haven't been able to get on the forum, hope you're doing well 
Wanted to do an update on how things are going,
My daughter and I have been having 8 hours together, and it's going to overnights soon, I know this progressive arrangement is like many other people's, how is everyone finding it? I think it's good, although 2 times a week would be better for my daughter I believe.
I am having a chat with the cafcass lady next week, any tips anyone has? What kind of questions are asked etc?
She left me a message saying how important routine was for my daughter, this was over something about the day in the week and it changing etc, bit of a long story, but she made a point to say my daughters routine of going to a play group is important and keeping routine is important. I agree with this.
But, 1. Her routine was destroyed when ex decided to start all of this, one of her main caregivers was gone and she didn't see for months, plus hasn't seen any of her family she grew up with for nearly a year now.
And 2. My daughters normality should be restored, her routine of being with her daddy and mummy.
I hope Cafcass, who say they solely focus on the childs welfare, also see this obvious fact.
There's been dispute over timings, and ex's solicitor is so slow at replying, that it leaves no room to sort stuff out.
This whole system needs to be exposed for what it is, all over the news, like the royal mail scandal is. I think one day that will happen, it can't come soon enough.
Wanted to do an update on how things are going,
My daughter and I have been having 8 hours together, and it's going to overnights soon, I know this progressive arrangement is like many other people's, how is everyone finding it? I think it's good, although 2 times a week would be better for my daughter I believe.
I am having a chat with the cafcass lady next week, any tips anyone has? What kind of questions are asked etc?
She left me a message saying how important routine was for my daughter, this was over something about the day in the week and it changing etc, bit of a long story, but she made a point to say my daughters routine of going to a play group is important and keeping routine is important. I agree with this.
But, 1. Her routine was destroyed when ex decided to start all of this, one of her main caregivers was gone and she didn't see for months, plus hasn't seen any of her family she grew up with for nearly a year now.
And 2. My daughters normality should be restored, her routine of being with her daddy and mummy.
I hope Cafcass, who say they solely focus on the childs welfare, also see this obvious fact.
There's been dispute over timings, and ex's solicitor is so slow at replying, that it leaves no room to sort stuff out.
This whole system needs to be exposed for what it is, all over the news, like the royal mail scandal is. I think one day that will happen, it can't come soon enough.