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Ex has contacted social services and police again
- Thread starter Daneman14
- Start date
As Ash had indicated, no you don't.
What is important however, it's that you give her a genuine chance to rearrange contact, or rope to hang herself.
Daneman, I have read the first of your posts in this thread again. Your case much like mine and I don't want yours to drag in as much as mine has.
Your ex is implacably hostile, she c won't ever agree to allow contact to proceed unhindered.
Her allegations to social services and the police are injurious to the children and must be stopped.
You need to think carefully about asking the court for a Section 37 (the children are undergoing emotional harm) and/or applying for the child/ren to live with you.
How many children do you have and how old are they?
I've got two kids both under 8yrs old. Yeah the police and social services reports are really scary, cause I'm on a visa too, on the path to becoming a citizen, so anything to do with the police or that hinders my contact with the kids can affect my visa and she knows this. I have put in freedom of information requests, the police one came back saying they were unable to give cause it contains sensitive and personal information, which is very scary since I don't even know what she's been making up, and waiting for social services to get back. I did request case closure reports from social services but they said there were none so don't know what that means.
Also just got my youngests school report today and the absences and late arrival are appalling. 37 absences and 21 late arrivals, he's also only been at this school for 3 terms so it's even worse. Can any of this be brought up in the hearing for the breach of court order?
Can it?
It is *imperative* that you bring it up. Are you all having the same case as me?!
Low school attendance is a significant failing as a parent and needs to be brought to the attention of the court. 37 absences in 3 terms is appalling.
Well looks like the ex was able to claim legal aid again cause received an email from the exes solicitor today going on about they are only giving supervised contact through a contact centre. I can't afford that again, it was over £100 for an hour last time and don't agree that the concerns warrant this especially since it was all fine up till 41mins before I was to pick them up.
Still waiting on the court, it's been over a month since the breach and haven't gotten a date yet. Are breaches considered more urgent or not?
Still waiting on the court, it's been over a month since the breach and haven't gotten a date yet. Are breaches considered more urgent or not?
I think you should be hearing soon if it was an enforcement application. Maybe send a brief reply to the solicitor along the lines of
"Thank you for your email. There is a court order in placed dated xxxxxxxxxxxxx. Your client's allegations have already been dismissed and there is no reasonable excuse to prevent the children seeing me. Please confirm that Mrs Ex will be complying with the court order.
See what you get back. If they insist on supervised only then suggest supervised in the community with someone. I wouldn't tell them at this stage that you've applied for enforcement or they'll have more time to prepare new arguments.
ie take it in stages. The above email first. Then a brief one about in the community. If that's declined then a brief one requesting she pays half the contact centre fees. Don't rush the replies/communications. Hopefully by then you';l have heard from the court. Phone the court and ask when the hearing date is likely to be.
"Thank you for your email. There is a court order in placed dated xxxxxxxxxxxxx. Your client's allegations have already been dismissed and there is no reasonable excuse to prevent the children seeing me. Please confirm that Mrs Ex will be complying with the court order.
See what you get back. If they insist on supervised only then suggest supervised in the community with someone. I wouldn't tell them at this stage that you've applied for enforcement or they'll have more time to prepare new arguments.
ie take it in stages. The above email first. Then a brief one about in the community. If that's declined then a brief one requesting she pays half the contact centre fees. Don't rush the replies/communications. Hopefully by then you';l have heard from the court. Phone the court and ask when the hearing date is likely to be.
I already fucked it up by replying straight away in a bit of an angry state. I'm just so frustrated and angry that she is allowed to keep doing this. It's my eldests birthday coming up in a week and he's autistic so it's just crushing me. Also I can't call to talk to them fron the exes behaviour she may interfere and take words and manipulate them against me.
I appreciate it's frustrating but (no criticism) you *have* to do better for your children. If you've let the cat out of the bag, then she will as Ash indicates prep her bottom-feeding lawyer.
For the future, be a good boy (
) and play the long game. Any - even momentary - loss of control will be seized on by her. We know exactly what you're going through, all exes have attended Ms Faversham's School for Psychotic Exes and Bitter Harridans.
Be cool.
Oh fuck, fuck me, I fucked up then, over all these years I've kept my cool and now slip up. I just can't believe all it takes is them to make some stuff up or embellish something and just get legal aid, she already falsely claimed it last time.I appreciate it's frustrating but (no criticism) you *have* to do better for your children. If you've let the cat out of the bag, then she will as Ash indicates prep her bottom-feeding lawyer.
For the future, be a good boy (
We know exactly what you're going through, all exes have attended Ms Faversham's School for Psychotic Exes and Bitter Harridans.
Be cool.
I’m sure you can reclaim some ground - just send another better email 
Further to my email of x date - there is a court order in place and allegations have previously been dismissed. There is no reasonable excuse to breach the current order. Please confirm that Mrs Ex will make the children available on x day at x time. As you may be aware xxxx is autistic and separation from his Father may well cause him severe emotional harm.”
Make them worried you’re going to make a big deal about it all re emotional harm.
Further to my email of x date - there is a court order in place and allegations have previously been dismissed. There is no reasonable excuse to breach the current order. Please confirm that Mrs Ex will make the children available on x day at x time. As you may be aware xxxx is autistic and separation from his Father may well cause him severe emotional harm.”
Make them worried you’re going to make a big deal about it all re emotional harm.
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It'll be fine.
In the end the truth will out.
I used a swear word when picking up the children - not at them - out of frustration at the length of time it was taking for handover. The judge considered that of no significance.
Your ex will always try to wind you up. Win at court. Focus always on convincing the court of your arguments and put aside the opposition's lawyers.
And where possible win on paper before even getting into court by repeatedly hinting that your ex is failing to put the children's welfare first.
In the end the truth will out.
I used a swear word when picking up the children - not at them - out of frustration at the length of time it was taking for handover. The judge considered that of no significance.
Your ex will always try to wind you up. Win at court. Focus always on convincing the court of your arguments and put aside the opposition's lawyers.
And where possible win on paper before even getting into court by repeatedly hinting that your ex is failing to put the children's welfare first.
Exactly!I’m sure you can reclaim some ground - just send a other better email
"....you may be aware xxxx is autistic and separation from his Father may well cause him severe emotional harm.”
Make them worried you’re going to make a big deal about it all re emotional harm.
At court you must keep bringing it back to the impact on the child and your ex's refusal to consider their welfare.
Writing this letter now and sending it - even as a PDF by email - may lead your ex to dismiss it out of hand but you will present it at court and she will be asked why she didn't respond to it.
I sent an email to the solicitor asking to confirm the children will be made available tomorrow and got the response saying they will not until the safeguarding needs have been met. What are they talking about, I already agreed to not call my ex a liar infront of the children again, even though it happened once and the ex has said so much worse infront of the children, she has also used our youngest to send me voice notes asking for money.
Then the email goes on to say they will be applying for changes to the court order when my c79 is heard.
Also the email says-
We are currently advising and assisting our client so are not on the Court record as acting so any communication you may have with the Court at this stage should not include our details.
What does that mean?
Then the email goes on to say they will be applying for changes to the court order when my c79 is heard.
Also the email says-
We are currently advising and assisting our client so are not on the Court record as acting so any communication you may have with the Court at this stage should not include our details.
What does that mean?
The Court will do it all once you pay for it