After my wife had an affair, I extended my wardrobe to try to find myself.After a while, I decided that, adopting various looks/personas really wasn't me, and abandoned attempts to 'find myself'. I'm happy now, studying, working out, planning with concrete goals for the future and, working somewhere I'm happy to be. I even thought "fuck it" and had a nose job to help remedy a defect and recapture my youth. In Feb I'm having a face-lift. Soon I will complete the OU math and physics courses I've been studying, which will hopefully help me get a PhD place next year or in 2026 (in the past I made a connection with a Harvard prof, who has said he will endorse my application). Recently, I received plans for the self-build home I'm looking at. Now need to find some land. It's a long way from the council estate I grew up on. Like many of you here, I too, am indomitable. Onward and upward....
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Blindsided. Would Welcome Advice, Thank You.
- Thread starter skydock
- Start date
Divorce-Related Malicious Mother Syndrome, also known as Malicious Parent Syndrome:
So...one of my solicitors says that prosecutions for perjury are rare (they're right, I've checked) but that my case may be an exception. He says that the system is backed-up with cases where people are lying (usually to get legal aid but I doubt that applies in my case) and that there's appetite to make an example to deter people (and provide some time to clear the bottleneck). Apparently my evidence is as solid as it gets. It's a decision for the crown to make (to prosecute) but, having spoken to people in the inner circle (talking hypotheticals) they think it's likely (an attempt to prosecute potentially two people who lied about me, or maybe just one -- there are technicalities I don't yet understand). The thing is, I would be required to submit lengthier video footage than I already have in order to maximise the chance of prosecution.
I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm confident I will be exonerated/cleared of the criminal charges and, I think those who conspired against me were misguided. I wouldn't mind my mother-in-law doing community service for lying to the police but I'd feel bad if she were given a custodial sentence (even though she lied and that could have been my fate). It would be sad to think that my children might not spend time with her over Xmas 2025 or 2026 (as evil as she's been).
Thoughts?
I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm confident I will be exonerated/cleared of the criminal charges and, I think those who conspired against me were misguided. I wouldn't mind my mother-in-law doing community service for lying to the police but I'd feel bad if she were given a custodial sentence (even though she lied and that could have been my fate). It would be sad to think that my children might not spend time with her over Xmas 2025 or 2026 (as evil as she's been).
Thoughts?
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@skydock , in which family court is this? Financials or CAO? I too have thought about this time and time again, yes its rare an ex in the family court is found guilty of perjury, or contempt,which is my scenario, I believe from digging it would at best be 14 days suspended, and as much as i want this to happen, and ots out of a deep feeling of, you did this to me, you made me feel less than nothing, you dragged out the process unnecessarily so you made your bed now lie in it, but , I know the ex would turn it around and use it to further alienate my son, I can see now, look what your dad did, look what he did to me, how he made US feel,when in all context we as the other ex can't say nothing, cos we are told time and time again do not bad mouth the ex,yet we get the pu ishment and they carry on like butter wouldn't melt
CAO. I think it's more likely they would go for my MIL...
At the end of the day the courts will ask "what's best for the children?"
In our fantasies it would be wonderful to be vindicated and see people do time for a bit just to prove to the world they've lied. Especially nasty MILs.
But how will it make the children feel to see a relative go to prison/do community service?
This is why it's rare for C79 applications to amount to much.
There may be some solicitors wanting to clear the backlog but realistically it's a field day for them. What incentive is there to reduce a never ending financial supply for them?
In our fantasies it would be wonderful to be vindicated and see people do time for a bit just to prove to the world they've lied. Especially nasty MILs.
But how will it make the children feel to see a relative go to prison/do community service?
This is why it's rare for C79 applications to amount to much.
There may be some solicitors wanting to clear the backlog but realistically it's a field day for them. What incentive is there to reduce a never ending financial supply for them?
This is criminal court, nothing to do with the children (in terms of prosecution). The driver is the crown, not solicitors. The crown is having to deviate from standard procedure in order to have cases heard, taking atypical steps in the form of 'pilot' cases to see what works and meets protocol.
Yes, I wouldn't want prison but community service would be some kind of justice (and the children wouldn't be aware of that). A criminal record would perhaps affect my STBXW's employment prospects and I wouldn't want that either.