Independent Social Worker (ISW)

[Conan]

Hi Conan,

Could you please let me know how did you source the ISW? Did court ask you specifically to provide 3x ISWs contact and mother should select one out of 3 and also agree on the instructing letter? The court gave the mother a week to review the instructing letter. So far she has missed all deadlines and not sure what to do, I am concern if I do C2 App, court will order in her favor again.

Hi Gooddad
Originally it was going to be a contact centre but the wife insisted on an ISW which she sourced and recommended to the court. Originally, I didn't like it but my Barrister encouraged me to go along with it as the ISW will have to follow professional boundaries.

The arguments for an ISW - keeps the children within community settings and out of contact centres. eg I've been to pubs for tea, softplay centres and taking the dog for a walk. The key is to drive progression to get the kids home. but wife is resistant.

I'm based in the North West but the ISW covers the whole country,

Its based on keeping kids in the most natural settings possible.

 

[Conan]

Hi Ash,/Gooddad
Interesting update from contact number 7 yesterday (Shared birthday celebrations in a pub, over tea with my children and observed by ISW). This has been ongoing now since July 2024, Mum constantly blocking progression eg more time, unsupervised and return home - she is constantly writing to ISW with concerns, issues etc and projecting onto the children.

In my case, every ISW contact report is glowing (7 now completed)

Interesting conversations with ISW before and after contact session last night, she opened up to me:

1. She has been attempting to arrange a 1:1 with the children at their school to discuss feelings etc on return home or if any issues etc etc. Mum agreed to this happening at their school but is now insisting on a witness present (one of her friends/ or a parent at the school - I don't know who? The ISW rolled her eyes as she states i just need to do my job etc.

2. She stated that following the session with the children, she intends to apply pressure onto Mum regarding progression for the children to move to unsupervised and return home - she'll want to know why she is constantly blocking this happening.

3. ISW also stated that she is happy to raise in court that all she has observed and seeing is a loving relationship between a father and his children and she will stand up in court to testify on that!

4. In addition, I listened to the children stating that Mum is taking them out of school this Friday for 3 nights away at a holiday camp. No notification to me and I am due to go to parents evening this Thursday, thoughts - Should I question this to the school (eg fixed penalty notices or as for clarification whether they know if its on emotional grounds?) something smells very fishy here? Or remain quiet and let thechildren go away and have some fun!

Any thoughts, opinions welcome.

 

[Peanut 21]

Point 4, depends on if the ex has got permission to take the kids out of school/prepared to pay the fine/will say kids are sick.
It might be worth grinning and bearing it. It's frustrating as there's no way she'd let you do the same.

 

[Ash]

As long as it's not cancelling your time with the kids this week-end I wouldn't say anything. Just note it down.

 

[Conan]

As long as it's not cancelling your time with the kids this week-end I wouldn't say anything. Just note it down.

Thanks Ash
What are your thoughts about ISW being subjected to a witness? Implications for the final hearing and position statements?

 

[Ash]

You mean a witness to her talking to the kids at school? That's ridiculous. She's a professional. It would be up to the ISW I think - who might say - ok have her teacher present but she's not going to accept some friend of ex's being there.

 

[Conan]

You mean a witness to her talking to the kids at school? That's ridiculous. She's a professional. It would be up to the ISW I think - who might say - ok have her teacher present but she's not going to accept some friend of ex's being there.

Hi Ash
Yes, the ISW told me that she wanted a witness present when she saw the children. I guess I'm overthinking it and will just see what happens.

 

[Peanut 21]

You mean a witness to her talking to the kids at school? That's ridiculous. She's a professional. It would be up to the ISW I think - who might say - ok have her teacher present but she's not going to accept some friend of ex's being there.

I think a teacher or school counsellor would be normal and professional. No way another parent or friend as they're biased and might prompt the kids.