After some impartial advice....

[NewcastleBrownAle]

I have a fact find due anytime after August 2nd, Just awaiting a date. I am going to bide my time and use what I have against her in the correct way! I am not going to lash out or retaliate, she will implode by the way she is reacting in all honesty. All I want is to be a father to my children, I am not interested in arguing with her! I have everything written down and logged in files.

One issue I do have and do not know what to do about, is the fact we are due our second child and the midwife who is looking after my ex partner is also one of her friends and has obviously told her that she doesn't have to give me any details relating to our second child ( I do not even know the gender! ) as I am a risk, and she was also my ex partners first point of call in relation to my alleged sexual assault on her! Does this constitute as a conflict of interest and does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?

You don't have parental responsibility on the unborn child sorry. As for her friend being her health professional, you could argue about professional boundaries, but you would just make yourself look unreasonable and argumentative and there is nothing at all to gain. I would actually do the opposite - I'd congratulate her on her new baby and sound appreciative of her friend, will look much better in court as you are thinking of the child, not the battle with your ex.
A horrible situation, but you will simply have to wait and fight your corner in court.

 

[Nanaforsonsjustice]

I have a fact find due anytime after August 2nd, Just awaiting a date. I am going to bide my time and use what I have against her in the correct way! I am not going to lash out or retaliate, she will implode by the way she is reacting in all honesty. All I want is to be a father to my children, I am not interested in arguing with her! I have everything written down and logged in files.

One issue I do have and do not know what to do about, is the fact we are due our second child and the midwife who is looking after my ex partner is also one of her friends and has obviously told her that she doesn't have to give me any details relating to our second child ( I do not even know the gender! ) as I am a risk, and she was also my ex partners first point of call in relation to my alleged sexual assault on her! Does this constitute as a conflict of interest and does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?

When the baby is born, you can make a C2 application to the court asking for an order giving you parental responsibility, getting your name added to the birth certificate and asking for the baby to be made a subject child to the proceedings for the ongoing C100. You can also submit as part of that application a schedule detailing the time you propose to spend with the baby in the interim and how you would like it to progress as the baby gets older.

 

[Chi22]

Hi.

I don't know the answer because - the key bit of information - is that the child has not been born yet so legally I don't know where you stand in relation to parental rights (your name can't be on a birth certificate that doesn't exist yet!).

As a former worker in the NHS, pay no attention to the legal opinion of the midwife.

Ultimately the matter will be settled in shortly after birth, by which time you will have sought the necessary court order for a blood test for paternity.

You could start by thinking about what you could make into some convincing points to put before a judge in due course. Are there historic texts between you discussing your pregnancy where she implies or tacitly admits you are rhe father?

Although I know it might be disappointing to not know the sex of the baby, this kind of 'circle of poison' - where the ex's friends buy into her narrative and support her excluding the father from the child's life - is something I've read about before and experienced.

Try to keep a good perspective on it.

 

[Jase896]

You don't have parental responsibility on the unborn child sorry. As for her friend being her health professional, you could argue about professional boundaries, but you would just make yourself look unreasonable and argumentative and there is nothing at all to gain. I would actually do the opposite - I'd congratulate her on her new baby and sound appreciative of her friend, will look much better in court as you are thinking of the child, not the battle with your ex.
A horrible situation, but you will simply have to wait and fight your corner in court.

I know I have no legal rights over my unborn child, it’s just very frustrating not knowing anything and allowing a professional health care assistant let the bend the rules of the law to basically shut me out! I won’t even know when my second child will be born as I know full well no one will tell me which is heartbreaking.

 

[Jase896]

When the baby is born, you can make a C2 application to the court asking for an order giving you parental responsibility, getting your name added to the birth certificate and asking for the baby to be made a subject child to the proceedings for the ongoing C100. You can also submit as part of that application a schedule detailing the time you propose to spend with the baby in the interim and how you would like it to progress as the baby gets older.

If my current order is still ongoing once this child is born, can it be added to the same C100 or would I have to reapply for a separate one?

 

[Jase896]

Hi.

I don't know the answer because - the key bit of information - is that the child has not been born yet so legally I don't know where you stand in relation to parental rights (your name can't be on a birth certificate that doesn't exist yet!).

As a former worker in the NHS, pay no attention to the legal opinion of the midwife.

Ultimately the matter will be settled in shortly after birth, by which time you will have sought the necessary court order for a blood test for paternity.

You could start by thinking about what you could make into some convincing points to put before a judge in due course. Are there historic texts between you discussing your pregnancy where she implies or tacitly admits you are rhe father?

Although I know it might be disappointing to not know the sex of the baby, this kind of 'circle of poison' - where the ex's friends buy into her narrative and support her excluding the father from the child's life - is something I've read about before and experienced.

Try to keep a good perspective on it.

I am more concerned that this midwife has told her and signed a document saying I sexually assaulted her, with no evidence apart my exes say so.

I have pictures of pregnancy test and scans, and she has declared on this current order that I am the father, I also have a message from my ex stating that I could see this new child the same as our current daughter, so there is evidence there.

I would just like some information, but she has claimed that the police have told her that she is not to give me any information on both children, which is something I am looking into.

 

[NewcastleBrownAle]

I am more concerned that this midwife has told her and signed a document saying I sexually assaulted her

can you expand on this bit please, told who, signed what and for who?

 

[Jase896]

can you expand on this bit please, told who, signed what and for who?

According to the police disclosure, her midwife is listed as her first point of call for discussing being sexually assaulted and is named in the document.

 

[NewcastleBrownAle]

According to the police disclosure, her midwife is listed as her first point of call for discussing being sexually assaulted and is named in the document.

then leave well alone if I were you. She is entitled to the midwife that she wants and there is no professional breach if it happens to be a friend.

 

[Pj66]

You said the midwife is one of her friends? Good, bring that up in court with evidence if you have some, actually could be more beneficial having the SA thrown out as it will be a clear conflict of interest.

Have you been asked to go down the police station for this SA allegation?

 

[Chi22]

According to the police disclosure, her midwife is listed as her first point of call for discussing being sexually assaulted and is named in the document.

Hi,

This is complicated but I can only say that it isn't unknown for exes to make sexual assault allegations. I've been through this and the exes friend also backed her claim. They chose not to give a formal interview and so that ended their claims.

I too had a tough time. It will pass but it will also then be fully resolved. Once it does, you may find that these allegations work in your favour: they will demonstrate your exes focus is not the future or welfare of the children, but on reducing your role.

 

[Jase896]

You said the midwife is one of her friends? Good, bring that up in court with evidence if you have some, actually could be more beneficial having the SA thrown out as it will be a clear conflict of interest.

Have you been asked to go down the police station for this SA allegation?

So I was arrested on February 2nd and my bail was extended til August 2nd due to lack of work done by the police. So awaiting a decision, it would have been 6 months so I hope they don’t extend it again.

I am going to use it in court, as I feel like it’s a massive conflict of interest on her behalf having someone in that capacity backing her up

 

[Jase896]

Hi,

This is complicated but I can only say that it isn't unknown for exes to make sexual assault allegations. I've been through this and the exes friend also backed her claim. They chose not to give a formal interview and so that ended their claims.

I too had a tough time. It will pass but it will also then be fully resolved. Once it does, you may find that these allegations work in your favour: they will demonstrate your exes focus is not the future or welfare of the children, but on reducing your role.

One of her reports she has put in like I said has come back NFA so I am going to use that to show her intent and limiting my role as a father in her own selfish gain.

I have a lot of evidence to show she is maliciously trying to exclude me from the life of my children, so just need to bide my time!

She has been asked by the courts to produce
*a revised composite schedule of allegations, populated with the mother’s
summary responses to the father’s allegations
*It is recorded that the mother will pursue her allegations and today have been
reduced at court to allegations 3,4,5 and 6 only, and will rewrite each to be
more specific

As the way she did it first time round wasn’t in the correct format,

This means that she can’t change her allegations or add anything else into the mix or produce new evidence? Also she can’t change her responses to my allegations or produce new evidence? If she does it’s clear evidence that she is lying, am I right in thinking that?

 

[Chi22]

Hi, there's a lot there Jase, but basically yes. Neither of you will have filed evidence (that usually comes after the Scott Schedules have been whittled down (allegations limited in number, allegations and cross-allegations sorted in the schedule) and statements filed.

This is very good case management. The judge has informed your ex about which allegations they want to hear and insisting on conciseness.

I had, I think 2 allegations in my schedule and 2 only. I could (I reckoned) sell them in court. Like you I had lots of evidence so I filled it. And I mean, filed it *all*. Didn't mean I'd use it, but the judge was clear all evidence had to be filed by specified date or would be discounted. I don't want to get into details here (no disrespect to anyone else) but if you want an example of the type and amount of filling I did, please inbox me.

Oh, I think too that it is gives you the edge to file everything you have, because the ex will know the evidence is there to counter her claims.