Abh charge

[damon]

Hi,
I'm new. So sorry if I have put this the wrong group.

So I separated from my wife 6 months ago we have a 1 yr old.
We have had a section 7 report and everything for both of us was good no concerns.
So just had a court case as I'm asking for 50/50 but mother wants full custody with me just seeing them one weekend a fortnight.
So I see my child every other day for a few hours , I have court in couple of weeks as I put in a c100 and I have applied for full custody reasons.

Start of this yr my ex her mother and father attacked my mum,brother and myself.
The CPS have pressed charges of Abh and they have said not guilty and now waiting on a trial date.

My ex got removed from her family home by social services when she was young as the father was violet to her and her siblings what she also reported it her self, so I'm worried for my child's safety as I feel history is repeating itself.

My ex will not let me see my child unless im supervised ,the ex was hoping it was her that would do it but my mum is and that spoiler her plan. There is no court order for me to be supervised but ex said she would not hand our child over to me if I ain't supervised, her reasons to social worker was I'm mentally unstable, suicidal, drink and ride my bike, and homeless , but non of that is true at all no evidence nothing and the social worker has agreed with her. I know I don't have to be supervised as it's not in the interim order but she will stop me seeing my child.


I have also applied for a non-molestation order as I have also been jumped by a male saying it was a message from my ex to leave. The male was in the right place ,time and day that I drop my child back to the mother at the meeting point. Just all a bit suspicious and with him saying message off my ex.
Police was involved but can't find any evidence or CCTV at the moment but they are still looking the said.

She down talks to me when I'm have my child,tells me I have to send photos every hour and what he eats,when he sleeps and what we get up to and if I don't she will have a go at me.

The judge put the non molestation order on hold till he knew the outcome of the court and bail conditions.

She pleaded not guilty and bail conditions are she ain't aloud direct or non direct contact with my mum or brother, there was nothing about me , no idea why I have been trying to phone and find out.

So my question is what will happen with the mother facing Abh charges and my son in her custody?
Do I have a chance of getting my child in my custody with the charge over her and her family?

There is another section 7 being done as the court ordered it and has to be done by November as court in December for that.

But I put a c2 form in and have court in November asking for full custody with the Abh charge hanging over the mother.

Sorry for the long message just feel like everything is against the fathers and its not right.

If it was me with the Abh charge I wouldn't be aloud to see my child and I bet it would have to be supervised.

I have pictures of the clothes my child wears to come to me they are far to small for him months to small, he always covered in bruises on the face,legs,spine. She always says it was the cousin who is few months older than my child threw something and hit my child ect.
I know children get marks but not everyday .

My ex co sleeps and also with her sister and her child , when she stays at her mother's my child in in the cot with her little brother who is about 2.

She has her own place but hardly every there my child has no routine at all and looks under weigh, she goes out in afternoon drinking cocktails with my child there , not all the time but some weekends.

Im not stopping her going out but not with my child and not in the afternoon.

When I told social services they just said I was just stirring things up.

So I'm lost and worried and a broken father just trying to protect his child and feels like the system is against me .

 

[PunchingBag]

If I were in your position I would ask for full care of the child as well. If you have all the evidence then it sounds like you have strong grounds.
I would also take pictures of the bruises to show Cafcass.

NMO seems necessary and report to the domestic abuse helpline and apply for legal aid. You may want to act fast, really fast like within 24 hrs fast.

You may want to report to the GP and contact

Home - Victim Support

Victim Support is the independent charity dedicated to supporting victims of crime and traumatic incidents in England and Wales.

www.victimsupport.org.uk

https://www.nspcc.org.uk/

 

[damon]

Thank you for your fast reply.

I have been told i will not get legal aid as it's a family matter and they don't do legal aid for that anymore ?

What is NMO? Sorry.

I have all the pictures since 1st July of his clothes to small and all the bruises and marks. My child is 12 months and she puts 0-3 -3-6 and 6-9 month clothes on the child. I have clothes for him myself.

I have court November from the c2 application where I have applied for full custody,

Would I still need to phone the domestic abuse line if she has charges of Abh against her and it's waiting for her to re pleas in October then it goes to trial?

I pay for a McKenzie friend to attend court with me each time and he suggested the c2 application and the non molestation order.

I really hope I get the non molestation order as it's a great tool to have and I will feel protected.

The socal worker knows about the Abh charges and has said there nothing they can do as they don't see any problems with the child in the mother's care?

Would I be worth phoning cafcass myself?
No idea what I would say, really sorry I sound so pathetic.

Should put I'm 20 first time going through anything like this at all, so completely lost with everything.

I don't have any proof that they co sleep just what she has said to me but I do have proof of everything else

 

[PunchingBag]

You said "She down talks to me when I'm have my child,tells me I have to send photos every hour and what he eats,when he sleeps and what we get up to and if I don't she will have a go at me."

This is controlling behaviour and emotional abuse, it is considered as domestic abuse - which many men don't understand, it's not your fault.

You just have to call the abuse helpline, GP and NSPCC, and report her behaviour to all those organisations. I would also report to the police.

After that call the legal aid helpline if you are on low income and domestic abuse then you will be eligible for legal aid.
If you act fast then in the next hearing your position will be very strong.

If the social service is from the local council then maybe file a complaint against her that she is not listening to your concerns.

You have to go strong and quick before it's too late.

McKenzie friends are ok but use them only for writing statements, you are here now so you probably won't need them, all dads here are happy to help in preparing your statements.

NMO is a non-molestation order.

 

[damon]

I can't thank you enough for all your support and incredible information and support.

It's just me and my mum against the world it seems.

I will get on tom all that now and I will keep you updated for sure .
Again thank you

 

[Nanaforsonsjustice]

Hi,
I'm new. So sorry if I have put this the wrong group.

So I separated from my wife 6 months ago we have a 1 yr old.
We have had a section 7 report and everything for both of us was good no concerns.
So just had a court case as I'm asking for 50/50 but mother wants full custody with me just seeing them one weekend a fortnight.
So I see my child every other day for a few hours , I have court in couple of weeks as I put in a c100 and I have applied for full custody reasons.

Start of this yr my ex her mother and father attacked my mum,brother and myself.
The CPS have pressed charges of Abh and they have said not guilty and now waiting on a trial date.

My ex got removed from her family home by social services when she was young as the father was violet to her and her siblings what she also reported it her self, so I'm worried for my child's safety as I feel history is repeating itself.

My ex will not let me see my child unless im supervised ,the ex was hoping it was her that would do it but my mum is and that spoiler her plan. There is no court order for me to be supervised but ex said she would not hand our child over to me if I ain't supervised, her reasons to social worker was I'm mentally unstable, suicidal, drink and ride my bike, and homeless , but non of that is true at all no evidence nothing and the social worker has agreed with her. I know I don't have to be supervised as it's not in the interim order but she will stop me seeing my child.


I have also applied for a non-molestation order as I have also been jumped by a male saying it was a message from my ex to leave. The male was in the right place ,time and day that I drop my child back to the mother at the meeting point. Just all a bit suspicious and with him saying message off my ex.
Police was involved but can't find any evidence or CCTV at the moment but they are still looking the said.

She down talks to me when I'm have my child,tells me I have to send photos every hour and what he eats,when he sleeps and what we get up to and if I don't she will have a go at me.

The judge put the non molestation order on hold till he knew the outcome of the court and bail conditions.

She pleaded not guilty and bail conditions are she ain't aloud direct or non direct contact with my mum or brother, there was nothing about me , no idea why I have been trying to phone and find out.

So my question is what will happen with the mother facing Abh charges and my son in her custody?
Do I have a chance of getting my child in my custody with the charge over her and her family?

There is another section 7 being done as the court ordered it and has to be done by November as court in December for that.

But I put a c2 form in and have court in November asking for full custody with the Abh charge hanging over the mother.

Sorry for the long message just feel like everything is against the fathers and its not right.

If it was me with the Abh charge I wouldn't be aloud to see my child and I bet it would have to be supervised.

I have pictures of the clothes my child wears to come to me they are far to small for him months to small, he always covered in bruises on the face,legs,spine. She always says it was the cousin who is few months older than my child threw something and hit my child ect.
I know children get marks but not everyday .

My ex co sleeps and also with her sister and her child , when she stays at her mother's my child in in the cot with her little brother who is about 2.

She has her own place but hardly every there my child has no routine at all and looks under weigh, she goes out in afternoon drinking cocktails with my child there , not all the time but some weekends.

Im not stopping her going out but not with my child and not in the afternoon.

When I told social services they just said I was just stirring things up.

So I'm lost and worried and a broken father just trying to protect his child and feels like the system is against me .

Hi and welcome to the forum, your situation sounds just like my sons and I came here for support in helping him with the court process to see his son, he is 23.

Your situation does sound like you are in a strong position to get full custody and so long as you have the available evidence to back up what has happened to you you should come across well to the court and cafcass.

Who helped you fill in the non molestation order application? There is a charity NCDV that can help with a statement for the non molestation order and also in applying for legal aid. As a victim of domestic abuse you should be entitled to legal aid if you are on low income and don’t have savings over £6000. If you aren’t eligible for legal aid I would suggest having a direct access barrister for the next hearing, they can help secure the non molestation order and argue more interim child arrangements you have if not a change of residency.

Regarding the bruising and small clothes and living situation it may be worth speaking to social services again, and to document and record everything as you may need it in the future.

Thats strange that her bail conditions don’t relate to you as well, it may be worth contacting the police officer in charge of the case or victim support to find out why they don’t cover you as well.

As Punchingbag said, You said "She down talks to me when I'm have my child,tells me I have to send photos every hour and what he eats,when he sleeps and what we get up to and if I don't she will have a go at me." this is considered controlling and coercive behaviour as this is what happens to my son, the family court and cafcass see it as that but unfortunately the police don’t recognise it as a crime despite it being a crime. It can help secure the non molestation order though, although unfortunately the police don’t seem too bothered about minor breaches as my son has found, they don’t arrest and they victim blame. I work for the police and am appalled at their treatment of male victims of domestic abuse.

If you need help with seeing if you can get legal aid try this website, they can do a letter to support you legal aid application:

National Domestic Abuse Helpline - Refuge

National Domestic Abuse Helpline - Refuge

refuge.org.uk

If you need help with a non molestation order statement, try these people they helped my son:

Non-Molestation Order for Domestic Violence · NCDV

A non-molestation order is typically issued to prohibit an abuser from using or threatening physical violence, intimidating, harassing or communicating with you.

www.ncdv.org.uk

If you aren’t eligible for legal aid try this charity, get signed up for support and they can help with statements, reviewing documents and can even get a barrister for you at a lower rate than a direct a access barrister. They also do a coparenting program that courts approve of:

Dads Unlimited – Supporting the emotional safety of men and those they care about

www.dadsunltd.org.uk

 

[Nanaforsonsjustice]

I can't thank you enough for all your support and incredible information and support.

It's just me and my mum against the world it seems.

I will get on tom all that now and I will keep you updated for sure .
Again thank you

Just a thought is that your actual name as your username? If it is Ash can change it for you to stop you being identified.

 

[Nanaforsonsjustice]

You say you have a S7 report, are you sure that wasn’t the initial cafcass safeguarding letter?

What is your next hearing for they normally use letters like FHRDA and DRA?

You said she accused you of having a drinking problem and mental health issues, it might be worth getting a letter from your GP for the next hearing to confirm that you have no history of concern with mental health, drink or drugs if that is the case, this will be proactive and then they can’t ask for it at the next hearing because you will have provided it already.

 

[Peanut 21]

It's just me and my mum against the world it seems.

Your mum is a good woman.
You're lucky as some dad's struggle on alone.
You may seem it's just you and your mum but having just one person on your side is worth it's weight in gold.
You have this forum now too.

 

[damon]

Hi,
It was my mum who help me fill the form as I'm dyslexic so filling form is really hard for me and we had nobody else then.

No Damon isn't my real name

I will definitely phone to get appointment with my doctor for a letter.

I haven't had a letter yet for the court , I phoned the court and was told it was 18th December. Still waiting for the letter to see whats on it.
I will phone them today and try get the letter sent asap.

The judge ordered a section 7 report to be done this time again
To see who the child lives with,
How much time he spends with me and if it's over nights .
Whether there should be shared care
The mother's concerns with the father
Whether or not it appears that the child has suffered or are at risk of suffering any harm.


The first section 7 report one was a social worker who came to my mum's house where I live talked to me for about 10 min then left.

My ex's one was done on the court date as they couldn't get hold of her.

I was told it was a section 7 from the social worker who came to see me. She said she has no problem with me or the ex parenting.

But everything changed now with the Abh charge.

I have tried to phone the social worker to make appointment but can never get hold of her and everything I tell her she goes back and tells the ex .

I hope I'm explaining everything ok to everyone

 

[PunchingBag]

Ok, here are the steps I would take in your position:

1) You and your family are victims of domestic violence (DV), so you are eligible for Legal Aid. They may initially say no, but if you keep on pushing, you will get it.

2) Call DV support helpline as soon as possible.

3) Call the Legal Aid helpline 0300 200 2020 more info here.

4) Apply for a non-molestation order application again. You, your brother, and your mum all need protection. Make three separate applications if you want. Here is a free legal support phone 0300 081 0006 helpline called SupportThroughCourt
If your mum and your brother have some kind of protection order in place then NMO is not needed.

5) Find a legal aid solicitor here enter your postcode and you will find many, call all of them. Some will say they are not accepting legal aid, then call the next one.

6) Many dads working in the police may agree that if the CPS is pushing the case for a trial, it means they know there is strong evidence of ABH. They wouldn't waste time and money if there is no case. So this is good news for you.

7) Find the social worker's manager and send her an email with all the new incidents that are not reported in Section 7.

Always document your actions in writing, such as via email or text.

Video or audio evidence is not very useful in family court.

Don't be disheartened if someone isn't listening to you. You keep moving forward.
And keep us updated on your progress.

 

[damon]

There is a bail conditions for my mum and brother.
No direct or indirect contact.
Nothing from me. I'm waiting on the police officer to get back to me .
If not today I will go first thing tomorrow morning.

I will phone the DV and legal aid and I will keep you all updated

 

[damon]

One thing is it worth me phoning cafcass?
If so I'm not 100% what to say or how to start the conversation.
Really sorry

 

[PunchingBag]

One thing is it worth me phoning cafcass?
If so I'm not 100% what to say or how to start the conversation.
Really sorry

Yes, I think it's better to inform cafcass via email.

You can explain that you would like to inform them about the incident that occurred after the last report was compiled.

Incident 1:
Mention the date of the incident:___________
Location: __________
Police case ref number: __________
Brief info: Your ex assaulted you and your family, which led to police involvement. Your ex was arrested and released on bail.
Status: Awaiting trial and a condition that your ex is not allowed to contact your mum and brother.

Incident 2:
Mention the date of the incident:___________
Location: __________
Police case ref number: __________
Brief info: Someone threatened you to leave your ex alone when you went to drop off your child. (write exact words)
Status: Ongoing investigation.

If you need help writing sentences then you can use this tool Grammarly

 

[damon]

That is fantastic thank you sooo much

 

[Ash]

When I told social services they just said I was just stirring things up.

This is the danger - that social services or Cafcass will not see this as the ex being a bad Mum but just not getting on with you. Although I realise it's much more serious than this. I doubt very much you'll get a sole lives with you order. If the social worker has already said she has no issues with your parenting or ex's parenting then they are not going to take the child away from the Mother. I think at best you'd get "lives with both parents".

Sorry to put a damper on things but I think regardless of her abuse towards you, they aren't going to take the child away from her. If the child is covered in bruises regularly though then you do need to tell social services that. I wouldn't hold out much hope of them taking it seriously though unfortunately. They'd probably just do a home visit, see everything fine and close the case.

Unless there is evidence of harm to the child, or you have backup from social services re this, I don't think you'll get sole "residency"/sole lives with. They will see it as a personal thing between you and ex I think - post separation. Yes if it was you with an Abh against you they'd say you couldn't see the child or indirect only or supervised. When it's a Mother with one, it's not the same - not a fair playing field.

I hope you get some support re the dv.

 

[damon]

Thank you for your reply means a lot with all the information help and support you are all giving me.
Sorry not been on been running around trying to short everything out.
So the court case went ahead and they pleaded NOT guilty.

So the judge in the magistrates court said they couldn't deal with this case so have moved it to crown court.
Next month they have to go and make thee ple again and if the do not guilty again it will go to trial .

Bail conditions are only for my mum and brother not me ...they are no direct or in direct contact with my mum or brother.
I have been to police station 3 times to find out why they are not using my statement or why I ain't named on the bail.
So they have said it's because I had said I can't use my statement as the ex will stop me seeing my child, so Im not hold much hope to be able to get legal aid now either if they ain't using my statement and I'm not named on the bail conditions then I can't see me getting legal aid or the non molestation order.

I tried to explain to the police that the ex said if I go ahead with my statement I won't be able to see my child.

I have court end of the week for the non molestation application I put in to see if the judge will grant me one or not but not holding much hope for it.

I have an appointment with a solicitor this week to see about legal aid also.

Also I have 50% pr over my child, am I able to take him to the doctors if he was poorly without informing the mother that I'm doing it or will that look bad on me that I never told her?
Thank you

 

[Nanaforsonsjustice]

Thank you for your reply means a lot with all the information help and support you are all giving me.
Sorry not been on been running around trying to short everything out.
So the court case went ahead and they pleaded NOT guilty.

So the judge in the magistrates court said they couldn't deal with this case so have moved it to crown court.
Next month they have to go and make thee ple again and if the do not guilty again it will go to trial .

Bail conditions are only for my mum and brother not me ...they are no direct or in direct contact with my mum or brother.
I have been to police station 3 times to find out why they are not using my statement or why I ain't named on the bail.
So they have said it's because I had said I can't use my statement as the ex will stop me seeing my child, so Im not hold much hope to be able to get legal aid now either if they ain't using my statement and I'm not named on the bail conditions then I can't see me getting legal aid or the non molestation order.

I tried to explain to the police that the ex said if I go ahead with my statement I won't be able to see my child.

I have court end of the week for the non molestation application I put in to see if the judge will grant me one or not but not holding much hope for it.

I have an appointment with a solicitor this week to see about legal aid also.

Also I have 50% pr over my child, am I able to take him to the doctors if he was poorly without informing the mother that I'm doing it or will that look bad on me that I never told her?
Thank you

You may still get the non molestation order and legal aid despite you not being part of the criminal case, this happens a lot. So long as you have evidence re what happened to you and what she has done to you, it is possible to get legal aid and a non mol.

If your son is in your care and he is unwell you are allowed to take him to the drs as you have parental responsibility and yours is equal to the mothers. If you take him, it may be worth messaging her to let her know you have taken him and what the outcome of the appointment was.

 

[damon]

The judge I had last week was an older judge and with in like 2 minutes of him talking it was like he didn't want to give it .
Totally understand he wanted to know the outcome of court but I'm worried not that I'm not on the bail conditions that he won't grant it.

The judge did ask what would happen with hand over at contact so I have a meeting tomorrow morning with this like community centre and I'm going to see how much it would be if the ex dropped our child off there and I pick them up within. Min of her leaving and going around the corner . Or I wait inside the building a d she just hand our child to a staff member.

Think that way I will have an answer for.yhe judge. Wouldn't want her to pay nothing towards it will cover the cost my self .

The ex is also stopping my contact on every court days we have as she said , you are the one who has taken me to court. So what she said she will do it give me back 30 minutes every contact I have till the time is given back as she does not feel comfortable letting me have our child more than the 4hrs contact
She said she has been told that she doesn't even have to give me time back if she misses contact. She was told by a support worker she has.

The next court day is on my contact day (the non molestation one) so I won't have our child that day for contact.

Then the one where she has to give her ple is on my contact day also and the one for the c2 application I put in is on my time but that one is an hour after my contact starts, but I bet she won't give me our child that day either .

I have my son every other day for 4hrs. The mother has said she will fight all the way in court for me to not ever have over night contact and that she wants to stop me having so much contact and want it Friday afternoon till Saturday afternoon every other weekend if she has to.give over nights.

I was wondering would a judge go from every other day to 1 full day a fortnight?

The first assessment the SS said they see no problem with either of us and over night was fine for me but judge agreed with mother for every other day

I know from past messages that it will be hard for me to get full custody and if I didn't I would fight all.the way for 50/50 and would ask for the schedule
2-2-5-5.

I feel that gives our child 2 days a week that they will always be with the same parent etc.

Mother ...Monday and Tuesday (every week)
Dad.... Wednesday and Thursday (every week)

Then every other weekend , I feel that will be a good settled routine for our child, they will know as they get older what days they are with who.

Also wanted to do holidays week on week of if it's 2 weeks or more, so we can both take him holidays and he can see family that live away on her side and mine.

Xmas, birthday, Halloween etc one year hers next mine

Was going to say mother has this Xmas eve and day and I pick him up Xmas afternoon and have him till day after boxing day.

I have new yr eve and day till the afternoon and then next ur it's other way around.

Its the 1st week in October I got court for the c2 where I asked for full custody and for our child to live with me as the mother is facing Abh charges.
But after some messages I thinking it won't happen so would like to put that I have my son 50/50 and that way it's only 2 contacts a week with the mother I have to deal with so would be nicer for our child .

Sorry for the long message just everything is going around in my head and keeping me up at night as I want to the the best for my child and want to make sure I don't let me down and also dont mess the court up.

I am useless at taking Infront of ppl I go blank and panic ans get everything mixed up and panic .
So just wondering what you all think

 

[Nanaforsonsjustice]

The judge I had last week was an older judge and with in like 2 minutes of him talking it was like he didn't want to give it .
Totally understand he wanted to know the outcome of court but I'm worried not that I'm not on the bail conditions that he won't grant it.

The judge did ask what would happen with hand over at contact so I have a meeting tomorrow morning with this like community centre and I'm going to see how much it would be if the ex dropped our child off there and I pick them up within. Min of her leaving and going around the corner . Or I wait inside the building a d she just hand our child to a staff member.

Think that way I will have an answer for.yhe judge. Wouldn't want her to pay nothing towards it will cover the cost my self .

The ex is also stopping my contact on every court days we have as she said , you are the one who has taken me to court. So what she said she will do it give me back 30 minutes every contact I have till the time is given back as she does not feel comfortable letting me have our child more than the 4hrs contact
She said she has been told that she doesn't even have to give me time back if she misses contact. She was told by a support worker she has.

The next court day is on my contact day (the non molestation one) so I won't have our child that day for contact.

Then the one where she has to give her ple is on my contact day also and the one for the c2 application I put in is on my time but that one is an hour after my contact starts, but I bet she won't give me our child that day either .

I have my son every other day for 4hrs. The mother has said she will fight all the way in court for me to not ever have over night contact and that she wants to stop me having so much contact and want it Friday afternoon till Saturday afternoon every other weekend if she has to.give over nights.

I was wondering would a judge go from every other day to 1 full day a fortnight?

The first assessment the SS said they see no problem with either of us and over night was fine for me but judge agreed with mother for every other day

I know from past messages that it will be hard for me to get full custody and if I didn't I would fight all.the way for 50/50 and would ask for the schedule
2-2-5-5.

I feel that gives our child 2 days a week that they will always be with the same parent etc.

Mother ...Monday and Tuesday (every week)
Dad.... Wednesday and Thursday (every week)

Then every other weekend , I feel that will be a good settled routine for our child, they will know as they get older what days they are with who.

Also wanted to do holidays week on week of if it's 2 weeks or more, so we can both take him holidays and he can see family that live away on her side and mine.

Xmas, birthday, Halloween etc one year hers next mine

Was going to say mother has this Xmas eve and day and I pick him up Xmas afternoon and have him till day after boxing day.

I have new yr eve and day till the afternoon and then next ur it's other way around.

Its the 1st week in October I got court for the c2 where I asked for full custody and for our child to live with me as the mother is facing Abh charges.
But after some messages I thinking it won't happen so would like to put that I have my son 50/50 and that way it's only 2 contacts a week with the mother I have to deal with so would be nicer for our child .

Sorry for the long message just everything is going around in my head and keeping me up at night as I want to the the best for my child and want to make sure I don't let me down and also dont mess the court up.

I am useless at taking Infront of ppl I go blank and panic ans get everything mixed up and panic .
So just wondering what you all think

My son had an older male judge the first two times and he was very anti giving it but he seemed more anti because he didn’t see a male can be a victim of domestic abuse, my sons non mol application was then added to the child arrangements order and the magistrates have granted it twice now.

The magistrates asked the same as my son, my son asked for handovers at a contact centre but the magistrates said no, they do handovers between the parents where there is audio and visual CCTV and it’s silent handovers between parents just talking to child. Then in the non mol any communication about the child is to be in the parenting app Appclose and can only discuss child’s health welfare and education, ex can’t even ask about what they have done and what he has had to eat etc.

If you have a court order that says you can see the child every other day, she needs to make him available and if she doesn’t regardless of the reason you can ask a court to enforce the order.

As your child is so young the judge would likely want to keep the every other day arrangement going so that your son can maintain his bond with you. You could ask for overnights at the next child arrangements hearing and see what they say especially as SS think it would be ok.

My son asked for a 2-2-3 alternating each week schedule as his son is only 2, moving to a 2-2-5-5 schedule when he turns 5 and starts school. He then asked for special occasions as below and 2 whole weeks throughout the year with each parent to go on holiday.

Special days

Christmas- 24th at 12:00pm to 26th December 10:00am alternating each year.

Sons birthday- 5:00pm day before so he can wake up with relevant parent on his birthday, till 8:00am day after, alternating each year.

Father’s Day and mother’s day with the respective parent.

Easter Friday 08:00am to Easter Monday 19:00pm alternating.

Halloween alternating.

Each parents birthday with the respective parent, with son staying with respective parent the night before their birthday, handovers at 5:00pm so each parent can wake up to their birthday with son there.

Any other family member’s birthday to be agreed between parents.