Ok. Just leave him and his Mum to their communications. She might resolve something with him so he goes occasionally. But he might feel he can't tell her why he doesn't want to go back if it's a bit weird telling her she's treated him badly when she already knows it.
Try not to worry about enforcement - if it happens it happens. Just support your son and say you won't interfere in his communications with his Mother and you'll leave it up to him but if he needs to share anything with you or feels upset by anything, then he can do.
Your ex has probably been told it's up to your son.
The difficulty is - there are Dads on the receiving end of ex's saying 14 year old doesn't want to come (when they do) and so it's a tricky issue. I wouldn't be happy if mine had said he didn't want to come when he was 14. He never did though - he was always clear he did want to even though ex said he didn't.
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