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Advice wanted - living environment

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draven66

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Hi all any tips would be grateful on this.

My son lives with his mum and 2 half brothers in an area that is not pleasant but I know not everyone can choose where they live. My problem isn't just his living area it is also his home life. How can I change it? I can't say his mum is a bad mum cos she is doing her best but she happily swears at/in front of him, and tells him things he shouldn't be hearing for example - this weekend I picked him up and she told him that her boyfriend peed on her in the shower (not sexually) just cos he thought it was funny.

My son is constantly late for school (when he does go) due to having to make sure his younger brother goes to school. My son is 12 his brother is 10. There seems to be a lack of discipline in the household as he talks to his mum like rubbish with very little consequences and now he is constantly lying and hiding messages on tik too and Snapchat neither of which I agree with him having.

I would live for him to come and live with me full time but I'm not sure I have the grounds to make that happen. Talking to her is a waste of time as only ends in arguments. Any help would be appreciated.

Henry
 
There is not a lot you can do about his current living arrangements. There doesn’t seem to be anything there that can be classed as a safeguarding issue. Being late / absent from school is a worry but will be dealt with by local authority and they will seek to assist mother not punish.

However as your son is 12 any wishes and feelings will be taken if you do apply to court and if he wants more time with you and you can Accomadate then you could push for 50/50 etc.

However you would probably get a backlash from mother if you went down the court route.

What I would do is have a heart to heart with your son , find out if he is really unhappy and if he hints that he would prefer living with you. If you genuinely believe that’s the case then personably I would go to family court to push for as much time as possible.

He will probably want to move to yours when he’s 16 anyway if his home life is so unstable, but 4 years is along time to wait and if you can get him disciplined and into school with happy boundaries that could set him on the right path.
 
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