What should I expect

[Peanut 21]

I think the biggest shock for dad's in this boat is how nasty and conniving the ex can be.
They get egged on by solicitors, dodgy mums forums and other bitter women. It also highlights they're someone who already had a nasty side to them.
I think it's normal in the first few months after a seperation for anger and a desire for revenge. But once it drags on and on something isn't right.

 

[Richie1989]

I think the biggest shock for dad's in this boat is how nasty and conniving the ex can be.
They get egged on by solicitors, dodgy mums forums and other bitter women. It also highlights they're someone who already had a nasty side to them.
I think it's normal in the first few months after a seperation for anger and a desire for revenge. But once it drags on and on something isn't right.

Totally agree!! My exs solicitor was so aggressive in her approach. Why didn’t my solicitor just say ignore it, not worth paper it’s written on. Because they are making money from that approach. I had to tell my soclitor that i didn’t want to respond to anymore!! My ex solicitor even wanted to me to sign an under taking!!! Just a piece of paper at end of one of their very nasty aggressive letters. I now know it wasn’t official, didn’t mean anything at all. Why didn’t my solicitor tell me that. Again! To make money out of my anxious ridden responses

 

[Peanut 21]

And the amount they quote is scandalous.
In 2019 a solicitors firm quoted my partner £10-£15k for representation at general CAO hearings!
It doesn't need to be so expensive and adversary.

 

[Richie1989]

And the amount they quote is scandalous.
In 2019 a solicitors firm quoted my partner £10-£15k for representation at general CAO hearings!
It doesn't need to be so expensive and adversary.

I spent a total of 41k in 11 months!! Like you say scandalous!! I sold my work van, car, spent all savings, sold household items, spent all my savings, maxed credit card, overdraft and borrowed from parents, just to keep fighting!! I’m now on the verge of bankruptcy, living back with parents trying to rebuild my life!

My house rent alone was £950 a month on top of all that and then the rest of the living costs as well as having to buy from scratch all my daughters clothes, toys and so on. Totally destroyed me financially and mentally. The problem I had was my exs family was very wealthy so I had to keep going and going and what ever cost.

I think it’s even more scandalous that once all the allegations was proven false and I basically “won” in court they don’t make these evil people pay costings to the other side. It needs to change!!

I do see myself as one of the lucky ones being able to beg, borrow and steal for the money and having the items to sell. I am very aware other people don’t have such options.

It’s outrageous!! And still this system continues to break and severe families without any consideration for cost or reparation.