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The beginning of my journey.
- Thread starter JayMC
- Start date
Do the letters state somewhere that they are "without prejudice"? If so, they can't be used in court unless both parties agree to it. The point? It's worth bearing in mind that, if that's the case, don't expend too unnecessary mental effort on them (in terms of responding); just do what's necessary and be mindful that they can't be used as evidence unless you both agree.
They aren’t letters just emails from her solicitor.
They're wind up merchants.
Two updates.
First my bail has been extended to December, CPS came back with an action plan, not unsurprising seeing as all they did was a statement and interview that are polar opposites. So I can imagine the action will be H2H and CCTV enq (bit late) and speak to offered witness.
Second update on the travel matters.
The magistrates took my proposal as the reasonable one, she will drop off to me, I will return to her.
First my bail has been extended to December, CPS came back with an action plan, not unsurprising seeing as all they did was a statement and interview that are polar opposites. So I can imagine the action will be H2H and CCTV enq (bit late) and speak to offered witness.
Second update on the travel matters.
The magistrates took my proposal as the reasonable one, she will drop off to me, I will return to her.
Statements are in for Jan. she’s virtually done a bit of an about turn.
Offering slightly more contact an additional day (4hours) but no overnight stays until he’s 3 (2027) because his routine is important and he might get separation anxiety if this is rushed.
from there I can have him overnight every Friday-Sun (if after monitoring he has adapted to contact well) .
(what happened to church)
I’ve gone in with my amended plan.
2 full days from Jan
Full days become overnights from 1
50/50 on a 2-2-3 from 18 months
Won’t accept her proposal to wait till he’s 3, the way she has worded it it’s not definitive and leaves her room to backtrack out of it by saying he hasn’t adapted.
Bail was extended to March as the PIC hasn’t completed the action plan
She has also requested I get the conditions varied so we can use the parenting app.
Offering slightly more contact an additional day (4hours) but no overnight stays until he’s 3 (2027) because his routine is important and he might get separation anxiety if this is rushed.
from there I can have him overnight every Friday-Sun (if after monitoring he has adapted to contact well) .
(what happened to church)I’ve gone in with my amended plan.
2 full days from Jan
Full days become overnights from 1
50/50 on a 2-2-3 from 18 months
Won’t accept her proposal to wait till he’s 3, the way she has worded it it’s not definitive and leaves her room to backtrack out of it by saying he hasn’t adapted.
Bail was extended to March as the PIC hasn’t completed the action plan
She has also requested I get the conditions varied so we can use the parenting app.
Overdue an update, car was dropped due to no evidence just before Christmas
Contact has been going well, she’s done a 180 turn in her final statement offering alternating Christmas and Boxing days, alternating Birthdays and I can have him on his first birthday….
Her overall contact plans largely remain the same, moving the Saturday contact to a Tuesday … but no overnights til his 3rd birthday as he will “develop separation anxiety”.
Needless to say have countered with my own amendments.
Tuesdays and Saturdays until he’s 1
Tuesdays and overnight Saturdays from 1-2
From 2 Friday and Saturday overnights week 1 and just a Wednesday overnight in week 2 which will give me and him 6 nights a month.
Full 50/50 from his 3rd birthday on either a 2-2-3 or 2-2-5-5 schedule.
Lives with both parents.
Final hearing tomorrow!
Contact has been going well, she’s done a 180 turn in her final statement offering alternating Christmas and Boxing days, alternating Birthdays and I can have him on his first birthday….
Her overall contact plans largely remain the same, moving the Saturday contact to a Tuesday … but no overnights til his 3rd birthday as he will “develop separation anxiety”.
Needless to say have countered with my own amendments.
Tuesdays and Saturdays until he’s 1
Tuesdays and overnight Saturdays from 1-2
From 2 Friday and Saturday overnights week 1 and just a Wednesday overnight in week 2 which will give me and him 6 nights a month.
Full 50/50 from his 3rd birthday on either a 2-2-3 or 2-2-5-5 schedule.
Lives with both parents.
Final hearing tomorrow!
Good luck. Let us know how you get on.
Late night discussion with the barrister who felt in her exp 50/50 stepped arrangements over a 3 year period was too long to get the court to go for it. Considering how little contact I have had.
I pivoted into a 60/40 split staggered up till he turns 2.
Still wanted lives with both order.
After much negotiation, we managed to agree on the (roughly) 60/40 but mum wanted it staged up until he is 3 which works for me.
Increased short term contact until he’s 1 at 2 days per week
From 1 a weekend day will be an overnight
From 18 months I will have him 4 days and nights out of 14.
From 3 a 5th day and night is added for 5/14
Alternating birthdays and christmases.
Magistrates adjourned to consider the lives with, opposition council referred to it as “meaningless” but still shouldn’t be given.
Back in after less than 10 mins and shared care/lives with both parents order was granted.
Very happy with the outcome, in reality 2 days short of 50-50 but won’t effect my working (virtually at all).
I pivoted into a 60/40 split staggered up till he turns 2.
Still wanted lives with both order.
After much negotiation, we managed to agree on the (roughly) 60/40 but mum wanted it staged up until he is 3 which works for me.
Increased short term contact until he’s 1 at 2 days per week
From 1 a weekend day will be an overnight
From 18 months I will have him 4 days and nights out of 14.
From 3 a 5th day and night is added for 5/14
Alternating birthdays and christmases.
Magistrates adjourned to consider the lives with, opposition council referred to it as “meaningless” but still shouldn’t be given.
Back in after less than 10 mins and shared care/lives with both parents order was granted.
Very happy with the outcome, in reality 2 days short of 50-50 but won’t effect my working (virtually at all).