Section 7 - What happens? How to prepare?

[Windmill51]

I think by far the most important point made on DWK is don't get involved in retaliating to allegations made by the mother - Ash has spoken at great length about replying with empathetic tones to the mothers stance. And referring to the quality of her soup! Come with kindness in other words. I won't find it easy but somebody spoke about the idea of speaking to a grey wall on another thread which is a great metaphor.

Can I ask what notes you have made HaychAyy?

Thanks mate - things such as:

1) What I actually want from the order? Why it will be beneficial for my child?
2) What have I been doing in the interim to maintain a relationship with my child as best as possible?
3) What contribution I can bring to my childs life and things I am prepared to do?
4) A few questions I intend on raising
5) A bunch of other general stuff along the same lines

 

[bujanin]

I'm curious, has anyone on this forum who went through a Section 7, where there were false allegations by the ex, actually had a positive S7 report?

Have you had your interview and subsequent report now UkDad?

 

[Windmill51]

@UkDad - Had my interview this week, it felt like it went fairly positive! But I know a lot of dads who have said that and the report comes back shocking.
Kept 100% child focussed and even when prompted avoided slating ex.

I will share with everyone if the outcome is positive once I get the report back.

 

[UkDad]

@UkDad - Had my interview this week, it felt like it went fairly positive! But I know a lot of dads who have said that and the report comes back shocking.
Kept 100% child focussed and even when prompted avoided slating ex.

I will share with everyone if the outcome is positive once I get the report back.

@HaychAyy glad you had your interview and that it seems to have gone well. It will be interesting to hear about the report.

During the interview what sort of questions did they ask? What questions did you ask them?

Was the officer friendly, neutral, stern?

How long was the interview?

Feel free to DM if you prefer to keep things more private.

 

[DadLad]

@UkDad - Had my interview this week, it felt like it went fairly positive! But I know a lot of dads who have said that and the report comes back shocking.
Kept 100% child focussed and even when prompted avoided slating ex.

I will share with everyone if the outcome is positive once I get the report back.

Keep hopeful but also prepare yourself for when you actually receive the S7 report.

There seems to be a constant thread of where the ex's manipulate Cafcass and go to town with the allegations. Cafcass then take their word for it and provide recommendations based on that (without a single piece of evidence)

I think the majority of people on here know my views on Cafcass.

 

[JX11]

I think by far the most important point made on DWK is don't get involved in retaliating to allegations made by the mother - Ash has spoken at great length about replying with empathetic tones to the mothers stance. And referring to the quality of her soup! Come with kindness in other words. I won't find it easy but somebody spoke about the idea of speaking to a grey wall on another thread which is a great metaphor.

Can I ask what notes you have made HaychAyy?

I have thought about this a lot, I think it depends on your starting position if you have got something to gain follow the above, if you have got a position to loose fight like hell, sling as much as you want you are on equal footing. For me the starting position was established 50/50 informally, but still established over a year. The family court system is adversarial, hearings are centred on disagreements, of course it is nice to be nice but don’t self censor.

 

[bujanin]

There seems to be a constant thread of where the ex's manipulate Cafcass and go to town with the allegations. Cafcass then take their word for it and provide recommendations based on that (without a single piece of evidence)

This.

 

[Windmill51]

@JX11 - I hear what you are saying, got no contact at the moment.

@DadLad - yeah mate, not got my hopes up in fairness, will wait and see.

@UkDad:
Will DM you more specific details.

 

[bujanin]

Thanks mate - things such as:

1) What I actually want from the order? Why it will be beneficial for my child?
2) What have I been doing in the interim to maintain a relationship with my child as best as possible?

Hello HaychAyy

In regards to point 1 did you lay out the order (lives with/spends time with and frequency) that you will be asking for at the final hearing? And did the CC rep show interest in that at your meeting?

I am thinking to list the dates and times that I have attended all in person sessions (can't get past that damned contact word) offered with my child - this will show a mix of mornings, afternoons, evenings and weekends, different locations. I haven't missed one appointment in ten months. Given your experience is this likely to be information well received at this point or save it for the final hearing?

 

[UkDad]

For anyone reading this that had a S7 interview, I presume it is fair to ask the CC officer what were the wishes of the child when they talked with them?

 

[Windmill51]

Hello HaychAyy

In regards to point 1 did you lay out the order (lives with/spends time with and frequency) that you will be asking for at the final hearing? And did the CC rep show interest in that at your meeting?

I am thinking to list the dates and times that I have attended all in person sessions (can't get past that damned contact word) offered with my child - this will show a mix of mornings, afternoons, evenings and weekends, different locations. I haven't missed one appointment in ten months. Given your experience is this likely to be information well received at this point or save it for the final hearing?

Hi mate,

Yes, I did, I went into what order I am attempting to get, and why it is beneficial for child, ex and myself. She did, she raised a few queries on it specifically around the current distance between us in terms of location and also past experience to date on looking after my child on a one to one basis and what that looked like amongst other things.

Difficult to say mate, as mentioned, every CC officer is different. The general advice on always staying child focussed, avoid mud slinging and always make it about your child will serve well. It somewhat directs the interview towards discussing the child rather than focussing on allegations. (the way it should be).

Hope this helps in anyway.

 

[UkDad]

For anyone reading this that had a S7 interview, I presume it is fair to ask the CC officer what were the wishes of the child when they talked with them?

Anyone?

 

[Windmill51]

Anyone?

Can't comment on this one mate as my child is too young at this point so that conversation was never had. Will leave to others better suited.

 

[bujanin]

Hi mate,

Yes, I did, I went into what order I am attempting to get, and why it is beneficial for child, ex and myself. She did, she raised a few queries on it specifically around the current distance between us in terms of location and also past experience to date on looking after my child on a one to one basis and what that looked like amongst other things.

Difficult to say mate, as mentioned, every CC officer is different. The general advice on always staying child focussed, avoid mud slinging and always make it about your child will serve well. It somewhat directs the interview towards discussing the child rather than focussing on allegations. (the way it should be).

Hope this helps in anyway.

It really does help thank you.

I've read back through your posts and it's not clear although I know that you've not had contact. So can I ask did you go into this meeting on fairly good terms with the mother or has it been fractious, and the cc officer knew it had been so?

 

[Windmill51]

It really does help thank you.

I've read back through your posts and it's not clear although I know that you've not had contact. So can I ask did you go into this meeting on fairly good terms with the mother or has it been fractious, and the cc officer knew it had been so?

Will DM you with details.

 

[bujanin]

Just to be clear then. Anything given - most recently an item of clothing and photograph of me and the child - are broken or go missing when taken back to the mother's home.

When I am asked if I have any concerns by the CAFCASS officer, as it seems I most likely will be, even this nasty behaviour I should avoid raising on the S7 interview?

 

[Ash]

The trouble with stuff like that is - you can't prove it. If you mentioned it and they took any notice, you might just get a recital saying items belong to the child or parents will return clothing at handover. Which she would circumvent somehow. I had this for years - it is harmful to the child - I had to let some things go (clothing) so child wasn't caught in the middle. Other things you learn not to send back. And indeed the child decides not to take things back, knowing they'll get thrown away after a while. It's not great. But sometimes you need to wait till she does something a bit worse and you have evidence of it. That ended up helping my second case in the end. But nothing was going to change the ex's personality.

 

[UkDad]

Has anyone had a scenario where it's obvious their child has been influenced/coached by the ex to say false things to Cafcass?

If so, how did you respond to it during your interview?

 

[Chi22]

Not CAFCASS but social services and the police.

Ex. alleged physical harm to the children in my care. Social services (being not very bright) believed it without any corroborating witnesses or testimony. Police visited kids who failed to back her claims - but never spoke to me. Had the court not told me of the allegations, I'd never of known of that particular claim.

Long story short. I made clear it was horses**t, refused to capitulate to social services wish for a risk assessment, told them her claims were lies to stall the family case and included her claims for my Fact Find. She never did of course include them in her Scott Schedule because she knew she'd be found out.

The answer is, state the obvious.

- All the claims are untrue
- If the claims are true, where is the *contemporaneous* evidence from the ex or the children.
- Were they reported to the school?Social services? The police?
- Did she send you a text or email * at the time*? In fact, at that time, what did she text/email you about?

Then match that with the children's views/willingness to attend contact at the point at all which your ex's claims (through the children) that such and such happened).

Hearsay does legally have a place in family court. However, a claim made to a professional (social sevices, CAFCASS, the school or police) will have little standing if not supported by an ABC interview. But you can keep that under your hat.

 

[bujanin]

Has anyone had a scenario where it's obvious their child has been influenced/coached by the ex to say false things to Cafcass?

If so, how did you respond to it during your interview?

My daughter is being put under pressure to say what the mother wants her to say.


I did dm you b/c the specifics are a bit specific.