School trips on top of maintenance

[Ford209]

Hi all

I currently pay maintenance at the CMS recommended rate for my 2 daughters. This has always been enough and I have never been asked for more for anything.

Since things got hostile with my ex and her partner because they didn’t get their way in court she is now asking for half of things like trips on top of the maintenance.

I have always said I would pay extra for big ticket school trip but this would involve a nominal amount of less than £20.
my question is am I being unreasonable to dig in and not pay it and should I just let the ex be bitter and petty and pay it to avoid another unneeded argument? My worry is then I set a precedent but then I equally worry she won’t let my daughter go and use it as an opportunity to alienate ( read past posts you will see why I think this).

What do you guys do around school trips etc?

Thank you

 

[Ash]

This is a tricky one as it's fairly standard, in agreements to share the cost of any school trips separate from CMS - if they're agreed. Some are quite expensive. In parenting agreements it's often advised to say the cost of agreed school trips will be shared equally up to £250, and anything costing more than that would need discussion.

But if, like my ex, she signs your child up for three x £1000 school trips you would be within your rights to say you're only agreeing to one of them.

 

[Scoobydoo]

My advice for what it’s worth . As ash said If reasonable and affordable just pay it

Ultimately your children gain form the experience and we mustn’t lose sight of that as we ( including me can get caught up in hostility and anger etc )

My punishment along with other things was withholding contact as with other things exes anger started to build .. my advice to any dad now is .. within reason keep them sweet as you can as in the long run if they turn they have the most powerful weapon against you and it will cost you a hell of a lot more financially and mentally.

For the record I don’t think it’s unreasonable for her to ask for half ( as long as you can afford and she’s not a millionaire ). Keep the peace man. It will pay dividends. They have the power … and we need to realise that … sadly the courts are changing but it’s slow so avoid contact issues if you can .. this kind of thing can be a trigger