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BigLes

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Hi me again. I'm writing my statement and I'm having difficulty in writing my proposed schedule of increasing time (culminating in equal shared care), and would appreciate some help. Presently the arrangement has been stuck at "Week 1 - Saturday 9am until Sunday 5pm, Week 2 - Sunday 9am to 5pm". Child will be 2 years and 2 months when final hearing takes place. The updating statement that I'm submitting has a strict page limit and so (frustratingly) I have to keep the schedule part brief. I find its something that is easily described visually but can be confusing when written out in legal speak.

What I'm proposing is:
"I propose a progressive schedule in which (Child's) time with me is increased at a gradual pace, resulting in a settled schedule with two comfortable homes for (Child). My proposal avoids (Child) spending a long time away from either parent and maximises the involvement of each parent in his life. I propose the following fortnightly schedule:
  • Week 1
    • from 04.03.2023, 10am on Saturday until 6pm on Sunday with me; from 14.04.2023, 6pm on Friday until 6pm on Sunday with me; from 22.06.2023, 6pm on Thursday until 6pm on Sunday with me;
    • thereafter a regular 2-2-5-5 pattern of care to commence from 28.08.2023, with (Respondent) until Tuesday 6pm, from Tuesday 6pm until Thursday 6pm with me, from Thursday 6pm until Tuesday 6pm on Week 2 with (Respondent).
  • Week 2
    • on 07.03.2023, from 6pm Tuesday until 6pm on Wednesday with me; from 09.03.2023, from 6pm on Thursday until 6pm on Friday with me; from 17.05.2023, 6pm on Wednesday until 6pm on Friday with me; from 25.07.2023, 6pm on Tuesday until 6pm on Friday with me;
    • thereafter a regular 2-2-5-5 pattern of care to commence from 04.09.2023, with (Respondent) until Tuesday 6pm, from Tuesday 6pm until Sunday 6pm with me, from Sunday 6pm until Tuesday 6pm on Week 1 with (Respondent)."
There is a good reason why I say "on 07.03.2023, from 6pm Tuesday until 6pm on Wednesday with me;" on Week 2 so just ignore that for all intents and purposes.

You can see that there are two elements to the schedule: 1) a period of progressing time and 2) a fixed 2-2-5-5 schedule. The two elements don't quite flow seamlessly into one another. Basically I'm proposing that the routine changes so that the ex gets 1 weekend a fortnight with our child (something that she has said she wants and something that the court would expect) but also that the time our child endures without seeing me is minimised as much as possible.

My solicitor has questioned why the 'progressing time' element of the schedule doesn't just naturally flow into the 2-2-5-5 schedule. My last barrister said the same.
She suggested instead a schedule where the progressing time' element looks more like the final 2-2-5-5 arrangement (e.g. on Week 2 I have him on Tuesday night, then after 2 months I have him Tuesday + Weds night on Week 2) BUT my issue with that is that suggested schedule involves our child going 9 days without seeing me every fortnight for the first few months. The only way to remedy this would be to do two handovers a week on Week 2 (this would receive pushback from mother saying "its too much travel"). Travel distance is presently approx. 1 hour but in the future it will be approx. 20 minutes. Pick-ups/drop-offs will occur at school when the time comes.

Solicitor also suggested a schedule that takes 10 months before it reaches the fixed 2-2-5-5 pattern. My feeling is this is just too gradual.

I realise I'm getting bogged down in the detail here but I really want a proposed schedule that is 'oven ready' and clear and workable but that doesn't involve excessive travel or long periods of our child not seeing me.

My questions are: 1) does my schedule make sense? 2) could a better "seamless" schedule be suggested?

My other issue is Christmas and birthdays. What I have written now is:
"(Child's) birthday and Christmas to alternate each year. I propose that the existing routine is maintained whereby (Child) spends from 9am of December 23rd until midday of December 24th with the parent that he is not spending the morning of December 25th with. I propose that Christmas is spent with (Respondent) in 2023, and (Child's) birthday is spent with me."

What are alternative wordings of xmas and birthday schedules? My family live 3-4 hours drive away and these schedules that split Xmas day in half are unworkable.

Thanks
 
Hi. If you're short on space you could just say at the end "I therefore request the court to make an order, as per the attached draft order". And attach a draft order with everything you want in it (I did that). The draft order doesn't count to the statement pages.

Having said that, if you go slightly over the page length by 1 page I don't think it would matter.

I would suggest something like this. Assuming your current alternate full days at week-end and increase from there. ie keep the current one day every week-end and start by adding a midweek day, then move on to change the week-ends to every other week-end. So you always still have the midweek day. Then move onto the two consecutive midweek days. So that would be something like

Child Lives with both parents

With Father

From x date:

Every Wednesday from xpm to xam Thursday and every Saturday from 6pm until 6pm Sunday

From x date:


Every Wednesday from xpm to xam Thursday and every other week-end from xpm Friday until 6pm Sunday

From x date:

Week 1 Wednesday x pm to Friday xpm
Week 2 Wednesday x pm to Monday xam


The last bit is the 2-2-5-5
 
This progresses from your current schedule to - a midweek night each week and a full night and day each week - which is a reasonable progression. Then to the midweek night each week and every other week-end until 6pm Sunday. (The downside to this temporarily is you have a 6 day gap between the midweek night and the next one temporarily). Then onto the full two midweek nights and EOW from Friday to Monday.

I think that's a good progression, increasing the time maybe after 6 weeks each time.
 
I had the same idea about submitting a separate schedule/draft order. My solicitor is whining saying "no it has to be 6 pages, not even the signature can flow over into pg.7."

Thanks great suggestion about the schedule. I was thinking something similar.
 
In a way it's easier to set out what you want in order type wording rather than I propose that etc. So it's easier to follow and clear.

The next bit after the weekly arrangements would be holidays so you could have something like:

And two weeks holiday per year with each parent until Child commences school, plus time at Christmas with both parents

From September x year when child commences school:

Half the school holidays with each parent

(At this point you could leave it as that apart from Christmas specified, or ask for defined specific weeks)

Christmas:

xpm 24th December to 11am 26th December and the last 5 days of the Christmas holidays with Mother in 2023 and odd years. The remainder of the Christmas holidays with Father

xpm 24th December to 11am 26th December and the last 5 days of the Christmas holidays with Father in 2024 and even years. The remainder of the Christmas holidays with Mohter


(or whatever Christmas arrangements you want).
 
BigLes said:
I had the same idea about submitting a separate schedule/draft order. My solicitor is whining saying "no it has to be 6 pages, not even the signature can flow over into pg.7."

Thanks great suggestion about the schedule. I was thinking something similar.
Click to expand...
6 Pages isn't very much. Mine was 8 pages plus a draft order plus all the evidence. Is this part of a witness statement for a final hearing?

Yes I would set out sample draft order wording - you could ask the solicitor to draw it up as a draft order (if he or she's inclined!).
 
My draft order was used for negotiations before the hearing - with bits added and crossed off or amended on the day until agreement was reached and that then formed the basis (and evidence) of the agreed wording for the final order. That was the barrister's idea though.
 
Ash said:
6 Pages isn't very much. Mine was 8 pages plus a draft order plus all the evidence. Is this part of a witness statement for a final hearing?

Yes I would set out sample draft order wording - you could ask the solicitor to draw it up as a draft order (if he or she's inclined!).
Click to expand...
Updating statement for final hearing yes
 
So not a full statement, but an "updating" statement?
 
If you are really limited to 6 pages and an updating statement (presumably a lot of evidence already submitted previously in another statement?) then attaching a draft order would be easier.
 
Ash said:
So not a full statement, but an "updating" statement?
Click to expand...
That’s right yeah. But I’m still expected to state what I wish arrangements are to look like going forward and these have changed since the last hearing.
It’s a struggle to cram everything in to the 6 pages
 
Is the solicitor helping to write it? Usually it's constructed around attached evidence, plus some argument for why the proposed schedule would benefit and any specific things particular to you and the child. And a bit about being positive about co parenting and suggestions for that maybe (depending on the circumstances).

A draft order could include recitals as well as ordered time. Recitals come before the ordered bits and are agreements. Or things the court thinks are a good marker to have in an order.

Eg

In case of medical emergency, the parents will inform each other as soon as possible, by phone or text.

Or

Both parents to communicate in a civilised manner

Or

Neither parent will denigrate the other parent to the child.

Depending on the circumstances. Recitals can also include things about holidays eg

Both parents will provide destination details and an emergency contact number, for holidays.

So basically think of everything you want in an order.

Passports you want in the ordered section, not the recitals section.,

Eg Child's passport will ordinarily be held by the Mother, and released to the Father no less than 21 days before any booked holiday it is needed for.
 
Some of this stuff was included in the previous statement. I can refer to that maybe.

Regarding passport - it seems sensible that the passport is held by the last parent who had cause to use it (it’s the child’s document after all). But release of the passport 21 days in advance seems a good idea.

There is some attached evidence but the thrust of the statement is simply that it’s in our child’s best interests to have a shared care arrangement, our child has a great relationship with his father and would benefit from a shared care arrangement rather than a weekend only arrangement, and it’s practical to implement it based on distance etc. I have been careful not to mud-sling too much and, whilst I have necessarily pointed out certain problems/faults with the mother’s behaviour, I have been positive about the co-parenting success we have had (and hopeful for the co-parenting success I foresee in the future).

I can only guess but the thrust of the mother’s statement will be “it will be too much of a change of routine for (child) and too much travelling between homes and (child) needs 1 stable home”. There may even be an attempt to say that “child has a bad relationship with father” or “I’m concerned about (child’s) safety” but these sorts of arguments hopefully won’t be given any time by the court (they would be unfounded of course).
 
The standard a court would order would be every other week-end and one midweek night, and half the school holidays. Providing the distance is reasonable for midweek nights on school days eg. ie no more than 45 minutes driving time.

What you don't want is a woolly order saying something like - x arrangement for now - any further arrangements to be agreed when child starts school - because then you'd be back in court again.
 
Yeah I agree I don’t want an order that says “we’ll mediate in a year’s time”. I want a progressing order that lasts until school age and beyond.

I’m aware of what the “standard/traditional” arrangement is. But I believe this is outmoded and I believe I can provide a higher standard of care than the mother. And I am arguing for an equal shared care arrangement on that basis. There are no practical impediments relating to journey times and distances etc (mother has sought to pretend that she doesn’t have a car in the past when she actually does. Regardless of this, the court indicated last time that this couldn’t be used as an excuse forever).

Mother has restricted child’s time with me to the bare minimum the court has ordered and refused mediation. Court has recommended that child spends additional time with father but mother has tried to actually reduce it. I suspect mother’s motivation (and probably advice from counsel) is that if we go to court with our child spending the minimum amount of time possible with father, then a court is unlikely to award equal shared care (despite my proposed schedule being one of gradually progressing time). She may unfortunately be right. This would mean that I would return to court in approx. 1 year’s time I guess and do it all again.
 
I agree. I just meant that whatever she argues, it's not likely to be less than the standard at least :-) And hopefully you'll get the equal shared care.
 
If you're getting a day every week-end, that's not really minimal time and every other week-end is standard. I think you could have a good shot at equal shared care. And if not then push 5 nights a fortnight shared care (ie every other week-end through to Monday morning and one midweek night). It would still be lives with both parents. But I think the two consecutive midweek nights makes a big difference - it's more normality than a single overnight. The trouble is, it is taking the time away from the Mother, that she is used to, so while you should go for it, be prepared to negotiate down to 5 nights a fortnight maybe.
 
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