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Mother not replying to CAO contact from Cafcass
- Thread starter Concernednan
- Start date
So I take it the Judge didn't accept him withdrawing his application then? That is good. I think they are on to her case. I suggest he perseveres because at this rate they could end up transferring residence. Judges don't like children losing a parent for no good reason. Whether the child "remembers" him or not, they "know" him. My son didn't see my partner for a year from 9 months old - but recognised her as soon as he saw her.
Also it is indeed in the child's best interests to know who their Father is growing up and have a relationship with them. His ex isn't God and the courts won't let her be.
Also it is indeed in the child's best interests to know who their Father is growing up and have a relationship with them. His ex isn't God and the courts won't let her be.
Another month, another court case this week.
She was traced, NYAS rep rang again- answered phone and denied it was her. She was basically told cut the BS I know it’s you.
It gets more complicated as when NYAS were talking to us I brought up something his ex had said that made me think child wasn’t his. She suggested a DNA test.
So the ex has agreed to one, also said ‘they can come round and see the child and will see he is her current partners’.
Also said if DNA proves son is the father, she still won’t let him see her.
Another reason for him not wanting to continue (apart from her being a control freak), is that he wouldn’t be able to look after child easily, as has changed jobs, and it would fall to me a lot (which I am happy to do). My husband/his dad has stage 4 cancer, so I am mindful of bringing a young child who realistically doesn’t know any of us into that scenario too. Although atm he is doing fine.
What gets me the most, is that my son has no evidence against any of the allegations she made about him, and he has just been played.
She was traced, NYAS rep rang again- answered phone and denied it was her. She was basically told cut the BS I know it’s you.
It gets more complicated as when NYAS were talking to us I brought up something his ex had said that made me think child wasn’t his. She suggested a DNA test.
So the ex has agreed to one, also said ‘they can come round and see the child and will see he is her current partners’.
Also said if DNA proves son is the father, she still won’t let him see her.
Another reason for him not wanting to continue (apart from her being a control freak), is that he wouldn’t be able to look after child easily, as has changed jobs, and it would fall to me a lot (which I am happy to do). My husband/his dad has stage 4 cancer, so I am mindful of bringing a young child who realistically doesn’t know any of us into that scenario too. Although atm he is doing fine.
What gets me the most, is that my son has no evidence against any of the allegations she made about him, and he has just been played.
It sounds like his ex thinks he is the Father (or doesn't know herself who the Father is) if she said IF the DNA test shows he's the Father. He is likely to be the Father though and she's just making excuses to cut contact.
I can understand it's a stressful time for the family with your husband having cancer. But I wouldn't rush into giving up just yet. The fact his ex is flouting court so much, there is a chance they might even transfer residency to your son. There are plenty of working single parents. And the courts do like a child to grow up knowing both parents and both families because it's an important thing for the child growing up, psychologically.
I can understand it's a stressful time for the family with your husband having cancer. But I wouldn't rush into giving up just yet. The fact his ex is flouting court so much, there is a chance they might even transfer residency to your son. There are plenty of working single parents. And the courts do like a child to grow up knowing both parents and both families because it's an important thing for the child growing up, psychologically.
Than you for the reply @Ash
There is lots more I could add, but it would look like I was a troll with an Eastenders episode plot.
I just want what’s best for a child who may/may not be my sons, but definitely isn’t in a safe environment whatever.
I am going to go to court with my son, on the off chance the NYAS lady will be there early too so I can speak with her. I probably won’t get into the court, but who knows? I can totally understand my sons reticence, as she is mixed up with a shady character. He is I think scared of him, but also wanting to protect us.
There is lots more I could add, but it would look like I was a troll with an Eastenders episode plot.
I just want what’s best for a child who may/may not be my sons, but definitely isn’t in a safe environment whatever.
I am going to go to court with my son, on the off chance the NYAS lady will be there early too so I can speak with her. I probably won’t get into the court, but who knows? I can totally understand my sons reticence, as she is mixed up with a shady character. He is I think scared of him, but also wanting to protect us.