Looking for advice

[annapo]

Hi all

I am here looking for some guidance or even examples of similar arrangements.
I am a firm believer in our child having a right to both parents and believe that will be best in the long run, however I am not yet sure of what this looks like in a practical or developmentally appropriate sense. For context, my partner and I are separating, have been married for 6 years and share 1 child (22 months). There are no welfare issues in the sense of abuse, drugs, alcohol etc however there is conflict between separating parents due to our relationship breakdown. My partner has moved 45 mins away to live with parents and we have been doing casual arrangements for our child to spend time with both of us since the separation.

We separated 5 weeks ago and everything is moving very quickly with mediation and solicitor letters.
I have been doing significant research on the separation process, mediation, court, child arrangements, parenting plans, child development, psychological effects on separation and co-parenting since our separation so we could make informed decisions together that place our child at the forefront ion tandem with each of our proposals as parents so I guess this is a further field study if you will...

Can anyone share their arrangements for a child of a similar age and brief backstory for how you landed there? I would very much like to be pragmatic about this, avoid court and be amicable however there is a lot of emotion and hostility between us at the moment.

TIA

 

[Jumper85]

Hi Annapo, sorry to hear of your situation. Thanks for sharing your story.

I've recently returned back to the site to support those Dad's still going through their journey as I've finally completed mine with success so it's achievable and can be done. I wish you the best of luck.

My children were slightly older than yours but I think there are a few key things here to think about;

• The distance created now by your ex and how that impacts an arrangement
• Ensuring you spend as much time as possible NOW with your child as it will likely be used as a foundation/starting point should things need formalising through courts

Again, there are far more knowledgeable individuals that have likely had more similar situations than me here so will leave them to comment. All the best.

 

[annapo]

Hi Annapo, sorry to hear of your situation. Thanks for sharing your story.

I've recently returned back to the site to support those Dad's still going through their journey as I've finally completed mine with success so it's achievable and can be done. I wish you the best of luck.

My children were slightly older than yours but I think there are a few key things here to think about;

• The distance created now by your ex and how that impacts an arrangement
• Ensuring you spend as much time as possible NOW with your child as it will likely be used as a foundation/starting point should things need formalising through courts

Again, there are far more knowledgeable individuals that have likely had more similar situations than me here so will leave them to comment. All the best.

Thank you.