Half-terms

[BigLes]

Hi All,

If a court order states that school holidays are to be shared equally then how are the 3 half-terms done each year? When is a school holiday deemed to begin? Is it at 3:30pm on a Friday (therefore creating 10 nights in a half-term? Or is it at 9am on the Monday following break-up of school (therefore creating 7 nights in a half-term)? Is it deemed to end at the recommencement of school? In either of the above, at what time and on what day does handover take place?

I can see that one solution is for Parent A to have child on 2 of the 3 half-terms on year and then Parent B the next year.

If each half-term is beginning when school ends on a Friday then Parent A collects child and has child Friday night, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday (handover on Wednesday morning); and Parent B has child Weds, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun and drops child at school on the Monday morning. The above would practically work if Parent A were set to have child on the Friday and Saturday immediately following commencement of the holiday.

This strategy falls apart with Easter, Christmas and Summer holidays but I don’t suppose that’s a problem…? What does everyone else do?

In the past I’ve just assumed that a school
Holiday starts on the first monday after schools break up, and then lasts until school starts again.

 

[Peanut 21]

My partner asked the court to add on extra time in half terms. He requested 2 days either the Mon and Tues after the weekend kids were with him or Thurs and Fri if they were due to be with him the last weekend.
I guess there's no technical term for the hols.

 

[bujanin]

Hi All,

If a court order states that school holidays are to be shared equally then how are the 3 half-terms done each year? When is a school holiday deemed to begin? Is it at 3:30pm on a Friday (therefore creating 10 nights in a half-term? Or is it at 9am on the Monday following break-up of school (therefore creating 7 nights in a half-term)? Is it deemed to end at the recommencement of school? In either of the above, at what time and on what day does handover take place?

I can see that one solution is for Parent A to have child on 2 of the 3 half-terms on year and then Parent B the next year.

If each half-term is beginning when school ends on a Friday then Parent A collects child and has child Friday night, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday (handover on Wednesday morning); and Parent B has child Weds, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun and drops child at school on the Monday morning. The above would practically work if Parent A were set to have child on the Friday and Saturday immediately following commencement of the holiday.

This strategy falls apart with Easter, Christmas and Summer holidays but I don’t suppose that’s a problem…? What does everyone else do?

In the past I’ve just assumed that a school
Holiday starts on the first monday after schools break up, and then lasts until school starts again.

I used this breakdown in my conversation with cafcass. I took it from a case that was discussed on here back in June:

1. "Half-terms – to be split such that the children live with each parent for an equal number of nights. For a one week half term, the parent with whom the children are living with on a Friday night will continue to do so until 12pm on Wednesday. For a two-week half term, the children will live with each parent for a block of eight nights with handover at 5pm on the middle Saturday.

   School holidays – Easter and Winter holidays to be shared equally with the children enjoying a continuous 7 night block with each parent. Summer holidays will be shared equally with at least one 2-week block with each parent. It is hoped that at least eight weeks prior to the commencement of holidays alternate agreement can be reached.

   Overseas travel is to be permitted. I have proposed alternative arrangements for this Winter that allows the children to enjoy an extended period with their family in the US, which I detail below.

   Bank Holiday arrangements

   For Bank Holidays that occur during school holidays, holiday arrangements will apply.

   Bank Holidays that occur during term-time (or other Monday school closure - e.g. staff inset days) will be spent with the parent who had the preceding weekend with the drop–off at school on Tuesday.

   Birthdays and Special Occasions

   Children's Birthdays and Parent's birthday – where a birthday falls in term-time the child will spend 60 minutes with the parent with whom they are not living with. Where a birthday falls on a weekend or in school holidays, the child will spend four hours with the parent they are not living with between 11am and 3pm.

   Birthday parties – the principal birthday parties held for school friends of S and T will be hosted alternately each year. The non-hosting parent may, of course, host a smaller more intimate party.

   Mother's Day and Father's Day – all three children are to spend four hours with the parent with whom they are not living with between 11am and 3pm where Father/Mother's day fall outside the lives with arrangements.

 

[Jumper85]

Problem is, if the court order isn't specific enough it's open to interpretation. You're just going to have to try and work it out between the 2 of you, if you can't then you'll need to request to vary the order.

 

[Ash]

It depends what's in the court order. I usually advise asking for a line that says "Holidays will start on the last day of term from school and end on the first day of the next term on return to school". The alternative is keep to usual week-ends and have the holidays start on the Monday. For half terms that would be 2.5 days added onto your week-end (either after or before) and changoever midday on the Wednesday. But then for some holidays, that means one parent gets more than half, if they get the first week-end and the holidays don't start until the Monday and then a week each (eg at Easter).

The reason I think it's better to include all the week-ends in the holidays, and have them start from the last day of term, is for the purpose of booking Saturday to Saturday holidays.

It can lead to a few arguments if it doesn't specifically say in the order. Then you'd have to agree it between you. Or end up with a situation I had before the holidays were clearly defined, where my ex would chop and change the start date around at her whim!

For summer holidays though, I think it's better to have a specific start date as those are sometimes divided into specific weeks. Like weeks 1 and 2 with Mother, weeks 3 and 4 with Father, week 5 with Mother, week 6 with Father. So then there are arguments about - when does week 1 start? And you need to know that to be able to book a holiday in week 4!

For the summer holidays I usually suggest it says something like "The summer holiday weeks will commence on the last day of term, if the last day of term is a Friday, and run 5pm Friday to 5pm Friday. In the event the last day of term is not a Friday, then the summer holiday weeks will start on the first Friday after the end of term at 5pm and any preceding days will form part of the usual term-time schedule.

Then set out which weeks with each parent and "any additional days will be shared between the parties". Because summer holidays are often longer than 6 weeks. And my son's school summer term sometimes ended on a Thursday - or even a Wednesday or a Tuesday some years.

 

[BigLes]

Thanks everyone. For the 1-week half term hols I’ll propose that which you guys propose (i.e. 5 nights each with a handover on the Wednesday). That should allow for trips to visit family or even a long weekend abroad.

There’s things that I haven’t even considered before like the principal birthday party (where school friends are invited) - if I don’t get some wording put into the order about this then I anticipate all his “main” birthday parties being dominated by Mum.

Also, term time bank holidays are something I hadn’t considered

 

[Ash]

In the Uk there is only one term time bank holiday and that's the one in Early May - a Monday. You could have a line saying something like "Early May Bank holiday will form part of the usual term-time schedule and be spent with the parent they would usually be with on a Monday". That keeps it simple. Yes it might mean you miss out on a long week-end if it's your week-end and Mondays are usually with ex, but it saves arguments. I didn't have anything in my order about it and Mondays were my nights. Ex insisted it was her night because it wasn't term-time. So it helps to have something in the order about it.

Alternatively you could have "Early May Bank Holiday Monday will be spent with the parent whose week-end precedes it". But it's possible it could fall on the same parent's week-end every year then it means one parent benefits and the other doesnt.

Birthday parties - varies depending on how you do it. They can have two separate birthday celebrations, and to be honest if ex had a party for child with friends, it's probably best not to be there. Kids feel conflicted with both parents in the same place when it's their birthday. I think some things you have to let go. Let ex have a party for her with friends - and you start your own routine of birthday celebrations - whether it's a day out somewhere or a smaller party with your family or whatever. Kids do seem to like having two birthday do's!

What you might want though in the order, is child's birthday day on alternate years.

So that would be something like:

Special Days:

Child's Birthday: These will be alternated between parents annually. With Mother in 2025 and odd years and with Father in 2026 and even years. There will be an adjustment of time from the usual schedule of 5pm the night before until 9am the morning after, with the respective parent, unless the child is already scheduled to be with the respective parent on that day.

Some of what you have in the order for child's birthday depends what time of year it is. If it falls during term-time, the above works. For a school day at least you get to pick them up from school, have the evening and take them to school again next day. And they've seen the other parent the morning of the birthday before school as well. If it falls during school holidays every year you need to work the holiday schedule around it instead of the special day adjustment above. Eg if child's birthday is 31st August, in the summer holidays, you'd want a schedule where the last two weeks of summer holidays alternates between parents each year (and the other parent gets a video call).

Sometimes the arrangements aren't perfect - Easter is at a different time each year. So there does need to be some flexibility and agreement sometimes. Eg if child's birthday is in term-time and you have the adjusted day and it ends up meaning one night here, one night there all week, then it's a good idea to swap nights that week so child gets a more normal schedule that week.