False allegations to police & now a NMO

[zach.georgie]

Hi guy's after some advice.

I was arrested in spring 23 after ex had made false allegations. I was then bailed, I have since been put on RUI. We had separated in month before, after a breakdown of our relationship.
I believe she made these allegations for several reasons.

I think it made her incensed that I was happy to go after she kicked me out.

That I started to become intimate with someone else after the break up.

And lastly for monetary gain (CIPA)

I was then arrested again for indecent images of my daughter. The images shown to me during my interview are definitely not indecent and I was in disbelief they would consider them to be so (she would have probably been about 4 in the pics, she's now 12)
I also believe the images were sent to me by my ex and she has also posted some of them on her Facebook account.
I am still on bail for this.

In this time I haven't been able to see or make any kind of contact with my children.

Last week I was served with an NMO with her false allegations. as far as I understand, being the respondent I am not entitled to legal aid, even tho I am currently unemployed and claiming universal credit so I will have to be litigant in person.

There is a notice of proceedings, family law injuction appointment and say I should attend when the court hears the application.

What happens at this hearing and what should I be doing to prepare for this?

It states I should write a position statement but have no idea how to do this or what to put in it.

There is also a "return date" hearing 2 days later I'm unsure of what happens at this as well.

Having a look through some posts I've seen mentioned it might be better to take an undertaking or cross undertakings.
What if my ex doesn't except it?
I believe I have evidence to prove she has made false allegations.

I've also seen Facebook groups saying put in c100 and some saying put in your own NMO.

Any help or advice for anything of the above would greatly be appreciated.

 

[NewcastleBrownAle]

seems like our ex's have a handbook of nasty things to do and your ex has read it line by line. So a few things.
1. Pointless serving an NMO on your ex, it won't change anything and will look like tit for tat - unwise.
2. The NMO, you can contest and it is for the ex to prove her allegations, but this takes time and you can't proceed with a C100 whilst it is in process, so an undertaking or a cross undertaking might suit you better.
3. At the NMO hearing , the ex's solicitor will seek you out before the court case to sound you out for an undertaking, the more eager they are, the more flimsy their case. Don't let the ex's solicitor dominate the hearing, get your side across FIRST before discussing undertakings.
4. I assume that you have told the police that the ex sent you those photos and has posted them on Facebook, they will investigate this, so don't get involved.
5. Start to keep everything as evidence, especially texts, create a timeline of events, keep a diary and do NOT tell your ex what your plans are from here. But file for the C100 as soon as the NMO court case has completed, one way or another.

 

[Resolute]

I am slightly confused. I thought a return date was for when application is made 'ex parte', i.e. no notice. An order can be granted in your absence, but the return date gives you a chance to put your case.

 

[Ash]

I thought that too. Do the court papers mention an ex parte hearing for the first hearing? Don't worry about a position statement - we can help you with that. One of the most important things with these processes is how you present yourself in court - Judges are influenced by that. So no display of emotion - especially anger or frustration. You kind of have to act calm and amenable despite the things being thrown at you. And dress smart.

Good advice from Newcastle - try to agree a cross undertaking with ex's solicitor. I am no expert in NMO hearings but plenty on here have had them and can give you advice.

I agree that contesting it could drag things out for a long time and prevent any progress with child arrangements. Most Dads on here seem to feel that doing an undertaking is the best way to get it closed down so you can move forwards with a C100 for child arrangements. Then you can start feeling in control a bit more and no doubt the allegations will be dismissed once the police close the case with no further action.

However - have you had a police interview? You're entitled to a free criminal solicitor for a police interview (not the duty solicitor) and some Dads have been advised to say no comment throughout. Apparently the reason being if you say no comment, they can't charge you - if they have no evidence - or pass it to the CPS.

I think we actually need a home page article on this as so many Dads get caught out by police interviews without representation.

 

[Ash]

The main thing I think is not accept an NMO as then you could be arrested if it's breached. If it's an undertaking I believe there is no power of arrest attached. Some ex's also try to make you breach it to get you arrested - by sending friendly messages asking to meet etc.

 

[zach.georgie]

Hi gents, sorry the late reply.
The first hearing was a mistake by the court as the hearing had already happened.

So the next one is the return date. But I'm still unsure how exactly how that works. I know I'll have a chance to, accept it, offer undertakings or contest it.
I feel that undertakings won't be an option because of the allegations made.

I did have a police interview and which was statement read out by my solicitor followed by no comment answers.
Bail conditions prevent me from any contact with the kids, haven't seen them for nearly a year.

I've written a statement for the return date hearing. Refuting the allegations and put some child focused statements in there as well.
Not sure whether I need to send it to her solicitors or not.

The hearing is via video so don't know if I'll have any communication from her solicitors but I did get their notes of what was said and happened at the hearings I wasn't at.

 

[Ash]

So she had an ex parte NMO taken out against you and the upcoming hearing is to hear both sides of things. Is there any chance you could take a lawyer with you?

 

[zach.georgie]

So she had an ex parte NMO taken out against you and the upcoming hearing is to hear both sides of things. Is there any chance you could take a lawyer with you?

Unfortunately that's not an option for me. Not worked since first allegations were made to the police so can't afford one.