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Enforcing sale of FMH

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Femto

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First post here, and appreciate that my situation pales compared to some of the awful things others are facing!

I'm going to spare much of the detail of the back story as after past lengthy legal proceedings I'm very cautious about putting anything too outing on a public forum - ultimately I left my ex due to her manipulative controlling behaviour and frankly still live in fear of what she might do.

Can anyone offer any advice or experience of having to return a clean break order to court to get it enforced?
Specifically getting ex to cooperate in selling the FMH;

House was ordered for sale 'forthwith' in the court order which was signed off by the judge last May (2023). Here we are 16 months later, not a single offer received, and interest has dropped off to almost nothing- the last viewing was 3 months ago!
In that time the consistent feedback has been that the property is massively overpriced, yet ex has only agreed to one very minor price reduction back in March. We're been dropped by our first estate agent as they felt they were wasting their time due to ex being unwilling to follow their advice in marketing the house (although they wouldn't put that in writing - that was just a phone conversation) - and I fear current agent will do the same soon.....

My solicitor has advised to hold off court action due to lack of evidence. The ex is very good at manipulating the situation so outwardly it looks like she is cooperating and not the issue- I'm at my wits end!
I'm currently left paying half the mortgage, CMS, repaying debts from the marriage all on top of my rent and bills - £3.5k leaves my account every month and I'm left living on about £150. Meanwhile she only has to pay half the mortgage and then has something like £2.5k a month left over to spend. There is no motivation for her to sell!

I'd like sole conduct of the sale and to drop the asking price to something sensible- how likely am I to succeed if I take this to court?
How much evidence would I need?
 
Repayment of joint debts from the marriage and paying a mortgage on the family home that predates separation both warrant a reduction in child maintenance. CMS don't tend to understand their own regulations, but 65(3)(h) of the Child Maintenance Regulations quite clearly allows for a downward variation on payments of a shared mortgage on the family home. Unfortunately, CMS often get this confused with article 67 which suggests that you mustn't have a legal or equitable interest in the property. So first you should seek a downward variation of your CMS payments, taking CMS to court if necessary if they refuse to follow their own regulations.

In terms of the sale, you could apply to the court to have a lower price on the property. I think that would be more successful than trying to take over the sale at this stage.
 
Interested, as I’m in an almost identical situation. It’s manipulation to the extreme yet other people just refuse to see the wood for the trees, and obviously I’m the bad guy!!!
 
I find it extraordinary that if your ex-wife has that kind of disposable income that you are expected to pay so much of the mortgage. Was this agreed by consent?
 
For anyone reading this who hasn't got a consent order yet, although it is counterintuitive I would strongly recommend that if there are pensions of sufficient size you take these and failing that you take a fixed lump sum owed by your ex in the future with interest payable if paid late but not attached to the property. It's far better than getting tied to the house because even with an order for sale the other person can string things out. Having no financial interest in the house means the occupant spouse simply cannot sit comfortably getting maintenance and half their housing costs paid (except with spousal maintenance but that is extremely unlikely if you have no interest in the house).
 
Thanks all - some really useful replies.

Unknown01 said:
I find it extraordinary that if your ex-wife has that kind of disposable income that you are expected to pay so much of the mortgage. Was this agreed by consent?
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At the time of the FDR she didn't have a job and was living off universal credit. Despite being far more qualified than me she argued that she had given up her career etc - fortunately the judge didn't buy that and assumed a decent earning potential so I ended up with a near 50:50 split on equity. However at that time she didn't have enough income to cover the mortgage and bills, so it was deemed fair that I continued to pay the half the mortgage. Miraculously shortly after the FDR she got a decent paying job - go figure!

Lester said:
What would be the consequences if you moved back in?
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Nuclear war?!
In reality.....? I expect that I would be arrested within the week on the basis of some fabricated allegation- she's shown repeatedly that she'll lie to maintain her narrative. I was advised early on by solicitor and barrister to not put myself in any position which could leave me open to any such accusation.

Unknown01 said:
Repayment of joint debts from the marriage and paying a mortgage on the family home that predates separation both warrant a reduction in child maintenance. CMS don't tend to understand their own regulations, but 65(3)(h) of the Child Maintenance Regulations quite clearly allows for a downward variation on payments of a shared mortgage on the family home. Unfortunately, CMS often get this confused with article 67 which suggests that you mustn't have a legal or equitable interest in the property. So first you should seek a downward variation of your CMS payments, taking CMS to court if necessary if they refuse to follow their own regulations.

In terms of the sale, you could apply to the court to have a lower price on the property. I think that would be more successful than trying to take over the sale at this stage.
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Thank you so much for this! I've done a little bit of reading, but not fully wrapped my head around how this works with CMS. Is there anywhere where this is better explained?
I tried to argue this point with one of the call centre minions a while ago and gave up. At this point even a small reduction in CMS would help!

Unknown01 said:
For anyone reading this who hasn't got a consent order yet, although it is counterintuitive I would strongly recommend that if there are pensions of sufficient size you take these and failing that you take a fixed lump sum owed by your ex in the future with interest payable if paid late but not attached to the property. It's far better than getting tied to the house because even with an order for sale the other person can string things out. Having no financial interest in the house means the occupant spouse simply cannot sit comfortably getting maintenance and half their housing costs paid (except with spousal maintenance but that is extremely unlikely if you have no interest in the house).
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Very valid points there - although in my case our pensions were very similar and far smaller than the equity in the house.
 
Ah, interesting about the universal credit! Right, check with your solicitor but I suspect the consent if the order was properly drafted there will be a clause which grants 'liberty to apply'. That means in the event of a dispute about applying the order either party can bring that issue back before the court to have the issue resolved. You should take it back to ask that she pays the full mortgage until sale now she is working.
 
Unknown01 said:
Ah, interesting about the universal credit! Right, check with your solicitor but I suspect the consent if the order was properly drafted there will be a clause which grants 'liberty to apply'. That means in the event of a dispute about applying the order either party can bring that issue back before the court to have the issue resolved. You should take it back to ask that she pays the full mortgage until sale now she is working.
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Certainly worth considering if I can get this back in front of a judge, although the 'liberty to apply' is limited to;
"The parties shall have liberty to apply to the court concerning the implementation and timing of the terms of this order only."
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As the mortgage payment is ordered to be shared I don't think that bit can be varied.
TBH its a bit of a 'pick your battles' - I just need the house sold!
 
Pick your battles, but the trouble with your situation is she has no motivation to sell. She lives in a nice house with someone else paying half the mortgage whilst she enjoys lots of disposable income.

I guess your best bet is to ask the court to take control of the sale because 1) you cannot afford to pay the mortgage anymore and 2) her mortgage capacity has increased and she can easily sell for less and still buy.
 
So how would one go about getting their share of equity out of the home if she has no motivation and won’t sell?
 
Unknown01 said:
Pick your battles, but the trouble with your situation is she has no motivation to sell. She lives in a nice house with someone else paying half the mortgage whilst she enjoys lots of disposable income.

I guess your best bet is to ask the court to take control of the sale because 1) you cannot afford to pay the mortgage anymore and 2) her mortgage capacity has increased and she can easily sell for less and still buy.
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Well that sums up the situation really! I'd go one step further and say that she is enjoying seeing me struggling financially....

The issue I'm grappling with is if I take this to court exactly to push for;
- A reduction in asking price is straightforward- the estate agent's feedback and lack of interest demonstrates the house is overpriced.

but beyond that there are still so many ways she could delay or frustrate the sale;
- While we both have conduct of the sale, she can still reject any / all offers received.
- Even if she accepted an offer, she could then delay her onward purchase so the sale falls through.
- There are so many stages in conveyancing etc which require cooperation and she could just ignore paperwork etc.

This could drag on for YEARS!!

My view is she's in breach of the order for delaying the sale (not selling 'forthwith' - which is defined as without undue delay)
Really I'd like either sole conduct with vacant possession on completion, or there's the nuclear option that it gets sold at auction.
 
You could just stop paying the mortgage and see what she does? If she is dicking around with the sale then she will be keen to avoid the court; you're not paying the mortgage vs her blocking a sale would probably be seen as tit for tat by the court. Unfortunately it is a game of "chicken" but if the alternative is years stuck renting whilst paying her housing costs it might be your best option. She's unlikely to allow the property to get repossessed.
 
Or if you want to go by the book, I do think liberty to apply as to how the order is implemented would include varying who is paying the mortgage until sale. If it doesn't, then it wasn't a very well written order I'm afraid.
 
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