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Cross examination and your final statement

Ash

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Cross examination is primarily on your statement. A solicitor advised me to know my own statement and evidence very well ready for cross examination. Ie read it through a few times. It's why it's so very important to be 100% accurate and truthful in a statement, and things you say backed up by evidence. Anything said without evidence will just be seen as "he said she said". But sometimes you need to explain the odd bit or describe the odd thing (eg child's time with him and things he likes) before you get to an evidence part. Also only attach evidence that is favourable to you. For example if one piece of evidence is a text conversation of a few messages, to show something really bad the ex said, it's only good evidence if your responses were whiter than white. If you've said or reacted in some way that doesn't look favourable to you, then don't use that piece of evidence. You do need to show both parties responses. So if in doubt leave it out.

When explaining something make sure the facts are 100% correct and not vaguely correct. With cross examination, what the other side are trying to prove is that you're lying. So they will try and find something contradictory in the statement and try to show you're lying - hence thorough checking for accuracy and things backed up with evidence. This works the same the other way - if you or your barrister can prove the ex has lied about something in her statement, or been contradictory - then basically her statement is dismissed as untrue and you "win the case".

That's basically what it's about at final hearing - it's formal and very legal - prove the other side is lying about something and you win the case. As in the Judge will order what you've asked for most likely (although Cafcass report might affect that too).

So this is why the final statement is so important. I learned most of this from a good solicitor. In my case, I thought mine was 100% accurate, but when my ex read it she immediately sent messages accusing me of lying about something. Solicitor said not to worry as it was a minor wording thing. I had given a reason for something being late as due to something being cancelled that day. In fact it had been delayed rather than "cancelled" as such - long story - but I should have worded it more accurately. But in the end I wasn't cross examined anyway as agreement was thrashed out at the hearing.

So the other side will go through your statement and evidence trying to find contradictions or things that aren't 100% true - and hopefully they won't find anything!

The other thing they do with cross examination is try to push you to make you get angry. So you need to be aware of that. Because if you get angry they then say - look he's aggressive. So being prepared is the main thing:

1) Be prepared to know your own statement and evidence well - read it through a few times to familiarise yourself with what you said.
2) Be prepared to stay calm at all times. If you feel pushed hard then it's perfectly acceptable to pause, take a breath or say "Can you repeat that please" to give time to get your head together or stay calm. But do not react or get angry or say "that's a lie!" etc. You can say no I don't agree with that as it's not true.

Having said that they can technically ask you anything during cross examination - but mainly it's focused on your statement and evidence. Either way - just be prepared, as above.

The ex will also have the same thing during cross examination. Often an ex's final statement is nasty, full of mud slinging and allegations without any evidence - because they don't have any! Which is in your favour. Courts don't like seeing parents mud slinging at final hearing. So hers will be frowned on in that case.

When statements are exchanged - expect a nuclear reaction. Once my ex saw mine she was desperately wanting to submit more evidence - my solicitor actually agreed to it because she said ex's evidence made her look worse than me.
 
Thank you Ash for sharing this as my final hearing is in January.

To prepare my final position statement is going to be based on the ISW contact reports (8 to date) and all extremely positive. She also needs to prepare her report but is unable to prepare this as the wife keeps blocking progression away from supervision to unsupervised time, extended time and back to overnights (all recommended by Cafcass). Cafcass also need to prepare an addendum to their previous s7 report which was reviewed at the last hearing in June but are awaiting ISW completed work. So ironic isn't it?

In addition, out of the blue, wife blocked me from attending the girls school a few weeks back, to attend a learn with me session with them, an open invite to all parents. She sent me the night before a text stating she would take the children out of school and I'm not supposed to attend as the school staff are not qualified to supervise? really bizarre. I have attended other sessions without her raising any issue before and the school has never raised an issue or any concern. I had to send a screen shot of the message to Cafcass of her aggressive message and my request to understand why she was taking the children out of school and this followed by a further aggressive message. I just requested Cafcass provide guidance and support on this, but they have not responded at being blocked from the school, it needed to be recorded as such.

As you've stated, totally remained calm and polite with Mum against a lot of abuse. I just share the facts and no mud slinging of Mum.

The ISW is very frustrated with Mum to say the least but I just keep ploughing on getting the positive reports and make sure time is spend positively with the children.

Its intolerable but I know from the learning here you have to keep whiter than white.
 
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When you say final "position statement" - is that what has been ordered? A position statement isn't the same as a "final statement" (AKA witness statement). A final/witness statement is your evidence, and has evidence attached. A position statement doesn't usually have evidence attached.

I believe in some cases, with magistrates they do only order a position statement for final hearing - but that's usually in simple cases with no welfare issues. Usually your final statement will be a "witness statement". If you look at your order - does it ask for a "statement" or a "position statement"? If it just says "Statement" then it's a witness statement, not a position statement. Your ISW report will be good evidence. Hope it gets completed.
 
When you say final "position statement" - is that what has been ordered? A position statement isn't the same as a "final statement" (AKA witness statement). A final/witness statement is your evidence, and has evidence attached. A position statement doesn't usually have evidence attached.

I believe in some cases, with magistrates they do only order a position statement for final hearing - but that's usually in simple cases with no welfare issues. Usually your final statement will be a "witness statement". If you look at your order - does it ask for a "statement" or a "position statement"? If it just says "Statement" then it's a witness statement, not a position statement. Your ISW report will be good evidence. Hope it gets completed.
Hi Ash, its a position statement. Sorry, loose with wording by myself.
 
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