Guest viewing is limited

CMS over-paying and 50/50 shared care

UkDad

Experienced member
Member
Hi everyone,

I have been over-paying CMS to ex for the best part of a year even though my child is with me half the time (often more than half the time) in my house and I would consider myself as primary carer (although ex seems to thinks she's primary!). I also pay ALL the houshold bills of which ex contributes nothing to yet ex lives in the house a few days per week for free (when she's not staying with her new partner).

The CMS allowance that I have been paying I know that she has been spending almost all of it on herself and not on our child.

Until now the CMS allowance has been a private agreement between me and ex.
However, now that I have reduced the monthly CMS payment to ex she is now going to CMS to make a case against me. Obviously she wants to get as much money from me as possible.

My understanding is that if I am deemed the primary carer then the ex should be paying me?? However she is on a low part-time salary so she couldn't afford to do so most likely.

Should I contact CMS myself to explain the situation and get a financial assesment done so I know what I should officially be paying/not paying for the allowance?
Or would contacting CMS be a bad idea and possibly worsen the matter?

Would be grateful for some advice from anyone with experience or in a similar situation.

Thanks in advance.
 
CMS won't believe that you're the primary carer unless you have a court order to show them. Without that, they will see her as the primary carer (especially if she is getting the child benefits. Have you thought about formalising the child arrangements?
 
CMS won't believe that you're the primary carer unless you have a court order to show them. Without that, they will see her as the primary carer (especially if she is getting the child benefits. Have you thought about formalising the child arrangements?
Thanks Ash for your reply. How do you mean formalising?
 
Formalising as in having it in a court order that the children live with both parents, legally. This could either be by consent (ie you get a solicitor to draw up a consent order stating that, and she would need a solicitor to approve the wording. When both solicitors have approved the wording it just gets sent to court for sealing). Or if she won't agree to a consent order then you apply to court on a C100 and ask for the arrangements to be formalised. It sounds like she's unlikely to agree to a consent order as then there'd be no child maintenance.
 
Formalising as in having it in a court order that the children live with both parents, legally. This could either be by consent (ie you get a solicitor to draw up a consent order stating that, and she would need a solicitor to approve the wording. When both solicitors have approved the wording it just gets sent to court for sealing). Or if she won't agree to a consent order then you apply to court on a C100 and ask for the arrangements to be formalised. It sounds like she's unlikely to agree to a consent order as then there'd be no child maintenance.
I have been considering this. It could be worth the solicitor consent order first and see how ex responds.
 
I talked with CMS over the phone who said in all likeliness I should not be paying any maintenance to ex since we both live in the same household with our child and I pay all the household bills.

Anyone here been in a similar situation and without a court order?
 
I couldn't comment on this specifically BUT I would agree with that position.

CMS is only really valid when you're seperated and living in two households.

If you're there and paying for the kids, then clearly there is no need
 
More threats from the ex today saying she is going to report me to CMS and make a PSO against me. I already pay all the household bills and I cannot afford to pay her CMS any longer. I'm basically into my overdraft each month.
 
Back
Top