After some advice with regards to CMS, I won't bore everyone with long details (unless someone wants them)
I've got an 8 and a 5 year old with the kids mum, and recently had another child with my new partner who is premature and in hospital.
Now granted, over the last 12-18 months I've job hopped around a bit due to unlucky start ups I've worked with and we were in hospital with my new son for 3 months prior to him being born due to complications which has then obviously knocked on paying the ex-mum CMS payments.
I notified CMS through the portal the day I was let go, and told the mum the exact same thing. CMS didn't update anything on their end, and I've now been told I've got to pay back dated from May to July because...that's the rules until we tell you otherwise?
Now, I've been amicable with the ex-mum (or tried to be at times) when she's sending abusive messages, stopping me from seeing my 2 boys sometimes unless I pay her extra.
I suppose what I'm trying to find out is a few things:
1) Why do CMS tell the ex-mum what salary I'm earning, yet when I ask what her household income is (as she's living with her partner now, and I'm not ENTIRELY sure, although I can't prove it) that they aren't declaring they are living together - surely they have to take that into account?
2) Based on my securing a new job and getting now paid weekly and it would be a £10K salary increase from what I was earning and paying her (£457/pm) I'm worried that with the new increase in my salary, CMS are going to ask me to pay more because I earn more, and financially I already struggle as it is with the rising costs of everything
3) Ex-mum is always asking me for little bits of more money here and there, £40 because she's skint here, £30 for petrol because otherwise she can't drop the kids off and I'll have to go and get them etc, she's asking me to pay extra towards the school uniforms and school shoes on top of what I already am paying her?
4) Because I've only JUST started a new job, her argument is that CMS will take weeks to come back with a response for how much she's going to get off me, so while she waits, can I send her some money to tide her over?
5) I was under the impression my CMS payments are to cover everything with the boys, uniforms, school shoes, food, coats, clothes etc - surely I shouldn't be paying anything else towards the ex-mum other than what CMS tell me to?
Am I being stupid here or petty? I can provide more context to people if I'm not being clear.
Thank you,
PD9
I've got an 8 and a 5 year old with the kids mum, and recently had another child with my new partner who is premature and in hospital.
Now granted, over the last 12-18 months I've job hopped around a bit due to unlucky start ups I've worked with and we were in hospital with my new son for 3 months prior to him being born due to complications which has then obviously knocked on paying the ex-mum CMS payments.
I notified CMS through the portal the day I was let go, and told the mum the exact same thing. CMS didn't update anything on their end, and I've now been told I've got to pay back dated from May to July because...that's the rules until we tell you otherwise?
Now, I've been amicable with the ex-mum (or tried to be at times) when she's sending abusive messages, stopping me from seeing my 2 boys sometimes unless I pay her extra.
I suppose what I'm trying to find out is a few things:
1) Why do CMS tell the ex-mum what salary I'm earning, yet when I ask what her household income is (as she's living with her partner now, and I'm not ENTIRELY sure, although I can't prove it) that they aren't declaring they are living together - surely they have to take that into account?
2) Based on my securing a new job and getting now paid weekly and it would be a £10K salary increase from what I was earning and paying her (£457/pm) I'm worried that with the new increase in my salary, CMS are going to ask me to pay more because I earn more, and financially I already struggle as it is with the rising costs of everything
3) Ex-mum is always asking me for little bits of more money here and there, £40 because she's skint here, £30 for petrol because otherwise she can't drop the kids off and I'll have to go and get them etc, she's asking me to pay extra towards the school uniforms and school shoes on top of what I already am paying her?
4) Because I've only JUST started a new job, her argument is that CMS will take weeks to come back with a response for how much she's going to get off me, so while she waits, can I send her some money to tide her over?
5) I was under the impression my CMS payments are to cover everything with the boys, uniforms, school shoes, food, coats, clothes etc - surely I shouldn't be paying anything else towards the ex-mum other than what CMS tell me to?
Am I being stupid here or petty? I can provide more context to people if I'm not being clear.
Thank you,
PD9
