well, the safeguarding letter arrived. It does have inaccuracies and in my view biased , but it's not as bad as I feared. Towards the end it makes recommendations to the court , including interim arrangements, but it doesnt say when or how these should start. Will the court contact me separately to authorise or something ?
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CAFCASS letter arrived
- Thread starter NewcastleBrownAle
- Start date
Do you not have a specific court date to attend? Usually the safeguarding letter is for the court to give a steer on interim arrangements and then the go-forward arrangements but I think you had to wait for the court to formalise any arrangement unless you're in communication with the mother and they are communicating and happy to implement the interim arrangements until something is formalised.
There is a gatekeeping hearing on the 11th, so I would hope to hear shortly after that.
You should hear something following the gatekeeping hearing. I would chase though. It could take two months to receive an update if you sit back and wait.
It may be that they list for FHDRA and decision on interim arrangement is made there.
Btw
Congrats on getting interim arrangement recommended
the recommendation is a few hours every other week in a contact centre, the very thing that the CAFCASS officer said was not helpful on the phone interview. The rationale is that his mother has made him scared of me and the contact centre will help with transition, but my view is that amount of time is unhelpful, as his mother is systematically turning him against me , just like she has done with the other children and their dads. At least CAFCASS seem to acknowledge that the PA is occurring.
Strangely, she also wants a letter from my GP regarding alcohol treatment and intervention and any other safeguarding issues, but there hasn't been any. My ex alleges I was drinking over 60 bottles of wine a month, that's 200 units of alcohol weekly, which would amount dependence and serious health issues, none of which I have. The fact is that I don't drink hardly at all, but the recommendation seems a little odd. The GP will just charge me a fee for a letter basically stating there has been no intervention or treatment, can't see how that is of any help to anyone.
As for the medical info - it’s just because your ex has claimed this so they want you to provide evidence it’s not true. But as Resokute says it could be good to get a pre emptive hair strand test as your ex will almost certainly ask for one at the first hearing and that will cause delays. If you’ve already got one you can knock that on the head early on. It will cost a lot more than a GP letter though!
You have to do it with a company that is court approved. They have a registered sample collector and a guaranteed chain of custody. 2cm is a bit too short, it will only cover time after her allegations if you wait until it is longer. I suggest body hair. It is better to do sooner than later to avoid delays as Ash said. Also, to have results that stretch as far back as possible.
My ex did everything possible to make my test late enough not to cover her allegations. Her barrister wrote to the judge requesting that I be ordered not to contact testing company. The order said I was to pay, her solicitor to instruct. I drove ahead and got the test lined up and paid for with sample collection booked. The only barrier was her solicitor giving the go ahead. He was cornered, the test went ahead
It covered from a week before the period where she said my already "chronic excessive drinking" increased beyond recognition. More than half of the six months was before I saw her allegations. My result was consistent with abstinence.
If you just get it done, you will not have months of wrangling. There will not be risk of you acting in contravention of a court order.
I sorely wish I had done as I now recommend.
My ex did everything possible to make my test late enough not to cover her allegations. Her barrister wrote to the judge requesting that I be ordered not to contact testing company. The order said I was to pay, her solicitor to instruct. I drove ahead and got the test lined up and paid for with sample collection booked. The only barrier was her solicitor giving the go ahead. He was cornered, the test went ahead
It covered from a week before the period where she said my already "chronic excessive drinking" increased beyond recognition. More than half of the six months was before I saw her allegations. My result was consistent with abstinence.
If you just get it done, you will not have months of wrangling. There will not be risk of you acting in contravention of a court order.
I sorely wish I had done as I now recommend.
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the allegations go back years, so not possible to test. so she is saying "previous alcohol abuse" , knowing full well that I don't drink. I've had one bottle of wine since the beginning of the year, hardly the 60 bottles of wine ( a month) that she claims. But not possible to test my alcohol consumption for 2022 ( which was not excessive anyway). 60 bottles of wine,, come on, I'd be unable to function at all LOL. Also, if my alcohol consumption was that high, I would need specialist help to get sober and it would take months.
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If you have no police record and never been done for drunk driving etc then she has no argument.I still need to let my hair grow long enough, as it simply isn't long enough to test at the moment. I suspect the court might not be interested, as CAFCASS are not asking for alcohol testing in their recommendations. At the end of the day, the burden of proof of alcohol abuse is on the accuser, and a clear result demonstrates that there is no safeguarding issue and the court is more interested in the future than the past ?
my issue with the contact centre is two fold. Firstly the ex will find excuses not turn up on the day ( seen her do this with the other dads) claiming he is "unwell" etc. The second is that my son will hate the contact centre and his mother will prime him with negativity, leaving me to try and pick up the pieces. What do I say to a little boy who is used to seeing me almost daily, to not seeing or hearing from me for 3 months, whilst his mother scares him by telling him I'm going to kidnap him.....