Biting your tongue…HOW LONG?!?!

[Ash]

It's tough having to keep biting your tongue. You can contact the nursery and say both parents details need to be on file as you're separated but living in the same house, and you'd like to ensure they have your contact details as well.

 

[Nujra Rof]

It's tough having to keep biting your tongue. You can contact the nursery and say both parents details need to be on file as you're separated but living in the same house, and you'd like to ensure they have your contact details as well.

They have both our details - I meant she changed the emergency contact if we aren’t available to her family members when previous is was mine. Her family don’t make the effort like mine do, not uncommon to not turn up to birthdays despite being 20 mins away. My family see the children every week multiple times, the kids love them but she is constantly trying to alienate me and my family from the kids now - even with the plan she had of her being main parent and me getting few days a week at best (in her plan), where as my plan gave us both 50-50 but she refused it on the basis of chopping and changing

 

[Resolute]

They have both our details - I meant she changed the emergency contact if we aren’t available to her family members when previous is was mine. Her family don’t make the effort like mine do, not uncommon to not turn up to birthdays despite being 20 mins away. My family see the children every week multiple times, the kids love them but she is constantly trying to alienate me and my family from the kids now - even with the plan she had of her being main parent and me getting few days a week at best (in her plan), where as my plan gave us both 50-50 but she refused it on the basis of chopping and changing

The emergency contacts are standard ground for trying to take control and diminish the other parent. One of many trivial steps to sideline. It is not good form to pull the nursery into squabbles.

However, I see no harm in telling the nursery that your family will likely be closer or more immediately available in case of emergency and you would like their numbers included. This way you would not be trying to override her inclusion of her family.

 

[Nujra Rof]

The emergency contacts are standard ground for trying to take control and diminish the other parent. One of many trivial steps to sideline. It is not good form to pull the nursery into squabbles.

However, I see no harm in telling the nursery that your family will likely be closer or more immediately available in case of emergency and you would like their numbers included. This way you would not be trying to override her inclusion of her family.

I think that alone might not be so strong in court however and rest is he said/she said and she’s already starting lying about threats and things she’s said stating they aren’t real and I made it up, what a joke

 

[Sid0926]

The only thing is we usually advise DON'T move out without a Child Arrangements order in place. Otherwise you're unlikely to get back in the house and the ex gets to dictate if you can see your kids or not.

I can see you're saying just 1 or 2 nights a week but - there's a chance she could just prevent you coming back.

Agree with this 100%. It can be tough when there is so much going on, the shouting, threats etc. however don't make the mistake of thinking you have to leave. In my situation I was blackmailed to leave the house and when I did she sold the majority of the furniture my tools etc and pocketed the money. I had no evidence to show the furniture or my tools existed. (lost about £2500). Get some representation, protect yourself and start documenting everything. Wishing you all the best.