I came back from a much needed getaway holiday abroad last Friday morning.
Overall it did me very good, but even on the first day of arriving to my place of stay I had it embedded in the back of my mind it'll be short and that I'll be coming back to this, to this whole situation, but that's why I want at least to change my job to make it all somewhat easier, because in this particular job I experienced a series of mental breakdowns which left me feeling exposed and vulnerable.
I am sure this is a very familiar theme with most fellow fathers here, who have either gone through similar experiences before or like me are still going through them now. It isn't often talked about the ways and the extent to which one's working life becomes affected by inexplicable humiliation in one's personal life, but for me it came to a point I could do even horrible cleaning jobs so long as I don't have to interact with anyone while working. And no, in situations where you've been accused of DA it usually is not possible to be able to confide in anyone about that, but that only compounds the feeling of vulnerability.
So I keep repeating to myself when I finally get to change my occupation once more, one thing I won't do is divulge any details about my marital/family status to any colleagues or managers, at all. I also aim to keep things strictly work oriented and try to avoid as much as possible discussions about personal lives.
I accept there may be those of you here who would disagree with this approach, but I also think it's okay we all find coping mechanisms in life which work for us, as individuals. For me personally, it would be much easier to return to a job tomorrow where literally no one would ask me anything at all about my holiday, how it was and expect me to talk about it and especially with great enthusiasm, when I have no desire to do that whatsoever.
If there's anything which makes me dread tomorrow, it's that. It's just me.
Overall it did me very good, but even on the first day of arriving to my place of stay I had it embedded in the back of my mind it'll be short and that I'll be coming back to this, to this whole situation, but that's why I want at least to change my job to make it all somewhat easier, because in this particular job I experienced a series of mental breakdowns which left me feeling exposed and vulnerable.
I am sure this is a very familiar theme with most fellow fathers here, who have either gone through similar experiences before or like me are still going through them now. It isn't often talked about the ways and the extent to which one's working life becomes affected by inexplicable humiliation in one's personal life, but for me it came to a point I could do even horrible cleaning jobs so long as I don't have to interact with anyone while working. And no, in situations where you've been accused of DA it usually is not possible to be able to confide in anyone about that, but that only compounds the feeling of vulnerability.
So I keep repeating to myself when I finally get to change my occupation once more, one thing I won't do is divulge any details about my marital/family status to any colleagues or managers, at all. I also aim to keep things strictly work oriented and try to avoid as much as possible discussions about personal lives.
I accept there may be those of you here who would disagree with this approach, but I also think it's okay we all find coping mechanisms in life which work for us, as individuals. For me personally, it would be much easier to return to a job tomorrow where literally no one would ask me anything at all about my holiday, how it was and expect me to talk about it and especially with great enthusiasm, when I have no desire to do that whatsoever.
If there's anything which makes me dread tomorrow, it's that. It's just me.
