Advice for cafcass meeting

[BilalDad]

Hi all,

Ahead of the cafcass officer writing a section 7 report for the child lives with order I have a meeting with her this Thursday. Has anyone had a meeting like this before? If so what advice would you give ? How best do you prepare? What are they likely to ask?

Thank you

 

[Peanut 21]

Hi all,

Ahead of the cafcass officer writing a section 7 report for the child lives with order I have a meeting with her this Thursday. Has anyone had a meeting like this before? If so what advice would you give ? How best do you prepare? What are they likely to ask?

Thank you

My partner has. Is the meeting on the phone or at your home? One big point I'd make is that you'd like to be seen with the children.

 

[blindex]

Hi all,

Ahead of the cafcass officer writing a section 7 report for the child lives with order I have a meeting with her this Thursday. Has anyone had a meeting like this before? If so what advice would you give ? How best do you prepare? What are they likely to ask?

Thank you

I had and the officer tried to lure me into a false sense of security. I don't know about your circumstances, for example if you made allegations against your ex. This is important as you'll need to address this carefully

Some generic Do's and Don'ts assuming that you did not have a FFH

Do's (pointers to ask or mention during the interview)

• If there has been an issue about your children adapting to seeing you again, be honest about that. Cafcass love when you admit that there are challenges and that you're happy to work at the pace of the child. Be sensible though, and highlight that the children are HAVING a POSITIVE experience
• How do you think contact can be carefully progressed?
• I wish to work with you, the courts and the mother
• What is appropriate from the perspective of the child?
• I want to draw the line under the past and build positive co-parenting relationship
• I want to build a positive co-parenting relationship
• How do you view my application for shared care?
• If there is a question you don't understand, ask her to repeat

Don't

• Don't raise safeguarding concerns against the mother. The officer that interviewed me asked me that, and when I said no, he said 'are you sure, because the mother will lash out at you?'. I held the line and said no
• If they ask about how you were as a partner, don't fall into the trap of self-criticising. Just reply that you were a dutiful partner and tell them to refer to your statement for a view of the relationship
• If there were allegations made against you, the Cafcass officer may ask you about that. If these have already been denied in your statement, don't fall into the trap of trying to explain events again to Cafcass. Tell them that you deny the allegations and refer them back to your statement.
• Volunteer any additional information in relation to incidents mentioned in the statement

As Peanut 21 mentioned, make sure you ask the officer to see you with the children

 

[BilalDad]

My partner has. Is the meeting on the phone or at your home? One big point I'd make is that you'd like to be seen with the children.

Hi,

Unfortunately it’s just at her office. I did ask her if she would not find it more useful to actually observe me and my son and she said no that’s not common practice.

 

[BilalDad]

I had and the officer tried to lure me into a false sense of security. I don't know about your circumstances, for example if you made allegations against your ex. This is important as you'll need to address this carefully

Some generic Do's and Don'ts assuming that you did not have a FFH

Do's (pointers to ask or mention during the interview)

• If there has been an issue about your children adapting to seeing you again, be honest about that. Cafcass love when you admit that there are challenges and that you're happy to work at the pace of the child. Be sensible though, and highlight that the children are HAVING a POSITIVE experience
• How do you think contact can be carefully progressed?
• I wish to work with you, the courts and the mother
• What is appropriate from the perspective of the child?
• I want to draw the line under the past and build positive co-parenting relationship
• I want to build a positive co-parenting relationship
• How do you view my application for shared care?
• If there is a question you don't understand, ask her to repeat

Don't

• Don't raise safeguarding concerns against the mother. The officer that interviewed me asked me that, and when I said no, he said 'are you sure, because the mother will lash out at you?'. I held the line and said no
• If they ask about how you were as a partner, don't fall into the trap of self-criticising. Just reply that you were a dutiful partner and tell them to refer to your statement for a view of the relationship
• If there were allegations made against you, the Cafcass officer may ask you about that. If these have already been denied in your statement, don't fall into the trap of trying to explain events again to Cafcass. Tell them that you deny the allegations and refer them back to your statement.
• Volunteer any additional information in relation to incidents mentioned in the statement

As Peanut 21 mentioned, make sure you ask the officer to see you with the children

Hey there,

This is extremely helpful thank you! Did you take anything with you to the meeting?

 

[Peanut 21]

Hi,

Unfortunately it’s just at her office. I did ask her if she would not find it more useful to actually observe me and my son and she said no that’s not common practice.

In almost 4 years of agro my partner hasn't been seen once with his children in front of a social worker/cafcass. In his last hearing in Sept my partner told the judge this. He grilled the cafcass officer about this. It may not be common practice but I'd push for this. It creates a more even playing field. They get seen with the mother, who in some cases coach the child.

 

[Resolute]

Hi,

Unfortunately it’s just at her office. I did ask her if she would not find it more useful to actually observe me and my son and she said no that’s not common practice.

It is very common practice for CAFCASS to see children with their parents.

I fear your officer is at least one of the following: lazy, uninterested, biased.

 

[Peanut 21]

It is very common practice for CAFCASS to see children with their parents.

I fear your officer is at least one of the following: lazy, uninterested, biased.

Like the ones my partner has dealt with.

 

[blindex]

Hey there,

This is extremely helpful thank you! Did you take anything with you to the meeting?

Not really because Cafcass won't look at any file or evidence you present. Some argue that these sessions should be recorded, and you could ask permission from the officer to record it. The flip side to that as he/she may see you as antagonist, and I don't think even if you recorded the session it can make much of a difference to the judge tbh.

You might just take pen and paper to keep a record of the conversation but then again you want to be focusing on providing good, solid answers... It is all theatre....

My best advice is to tell the officer, very politely, that at the end of the session you might send her some notes about the key points that were discussed, like you went to a formal business meeting and prepared the minutes after it. That should give you a degree of control over the process. So as soon as the meeting finishes, just record the key points as voice notes in your smartphone.

As others have said it is common for Cafcass to observe the children with the parents if they are of a young age. Ask her again if she will be saying the mother with the children, and if she says yes, then politely insist on this.

 

[StayStrong]

It is very common practice for CAFCASS to see children with their parents.

I fear your officer is at least one of the following: lazy, uninterested, biased.

And/Or lying.

Definately common practice and common sense.

SS.

 

[Ash]

Hi,

Unfortunately it’s just at her office. I did ask her if she would not find it more useful to actually observe me and my son and she said no that’s not common practice.

Very shoddy. They are supposed to see the children with both parents. However - if they don't, and their report is flawed, you can undermine their report at final hearing by cross examining Cafcass and asking them why they didn't see the children with both parents. Let them answer that one in front of a Judge. Then you can say - so how do you know how my children are with me if you haven't seen us togehter? That helps the case.

I guess if your ex has made allegations and is witholding the kids then it might be "common practice" not to see the kids with you if it's supervised time only but still lazy.

 

[Peanut 21]

Very shoddy. They are supposed to see the children with both parents. However - if they don't, and their report is flawed, you can undermine their report at final hearing by cross examining Cafcass and asking them why they didn't see the children with both parents. Let them answer that one in front of a Judge. Then you can say - so how do you know how my children are with me if you haven't seen us togehter? That helps the case.

I guess if your ex has made allegations and is witholding the kids then it might be "common practice" not to see the kids with you if it's supervised time only but still lazy.

Totally agree Ash. My partner called cafcass out in his last hearing and the judge disapproved and made the cafcass officer squirm. As Ash has said bring it up in court.

 

[Resolute]

Not really because Cafcass won't look at any file or evidence you present. Some argue that these sessions should be recorded, and you could ask permission from the officer to record it. The flip side to that as he/she may see you as antagonist, and I don't think even if you recorded the session it can make much of a difference to the judge tbh.

You might just take pen and paper to keep a record of the conversation but then again you want to be focusing on providing good, solid answers... It is all theatre....

My best advice is to tell the officer, very politely, that at the end of the session you might send her some notes about the key points that were discussed, like you went to a formal business meeting and prepared the minutes after it. That should give you a degree of control over the process. So as soon as the meeting finishes, just record the key points as voice notes in your smartphone.

As others have said it is common for Cafcass to observe the children with the parents if they are of a young age. Ask her again if she will be saying the mother with the children, and if she says yes, then politely insist on this.

You should get to see the report well before the hearing and get opportunity to correct any factual inaccuracies. Their intention is that this limits you to correction of names, dates, addresses... But it is a factual inaccuracy if they misquote something you say, it is also creates an erroneous factual account if they omit something you do say.

You would probably need to write to the manager. I found this an efficient and impactful way of putting right their shoddiness.

My inclination would be to record for personal use, especially if you do not have a razor-sharp memory. That should be enough to put right any errors or omissions (you would have to keep the recording to yourself).