Accused of abuse by mother and children - HELP!

[Ash]

I am really sorry to hear this. I am sure you won't be alone with that kind of report. They don't see alienation and decide that the children are in the middle of conflict (solely caused by the ex of course) so then can just decide to give them to one parent. It is so biased though isn't it?

Did they see the children with you at all, or just with the ex.

Don't give up because there's a chance to overturn this further down the line, and if that fails then an appeal is an option. Another Dad on here got left with supervised only indefinitely at a final hearing, appealed and got a full order.

They must be thick not to see it's only happened since the 50/50 order and unfortunately they are playing right into your ex's hands.

ISW report sounds like a good move. And keep remembering the line "Why would children who had a loving relationship with a parent for x years, suddenly decide they hate him?" Drop that in there at some point if you can.

It's shocking how these social workers are so blinkered.

 

[Pacific16]

Thank you. This is exactly our position. The children have always lived with me to include overnight stays, yet as soon as we’ve moved to 50/50, a use is alleged and extended to partner and both my parents. How likely is it that 4 people will abuse children having fought so tirelessly for 50/50, given up jobs, relocated, etc. plus it’s my parents who have funded the £70k so far tk get to that point.

Also of importance to us is that mum, having had abuse claims dismissed by the court in 2017, has taken them to the children’s GP, school, social media & social worker (all documented) plus parents at the gate (they have said to us). It’s impossible for mum to have sheltered the children from her true feelings, and now they are mirroring the same claims, to include adult language “controlling”, “feeling depressed”.

I just cannot believe all this is ignored.

 

[kadafi9]

Sorry to hear mate, I am going through a similar nightmare, false accusations after I informed my ex partner I would be filing for divorce.

She then refused to return the children to me, they were 2 & 4 at the time a few months ago, now 2 & 5. The children then went in to nursery/school and told staff I used to harm them. This was 6+ weeks after I had seen or even spoken to them. Both children had been at nursery/school for years prior and no disclosures made so its obvious the mother has coached them in to saying such things, however this seems to be totally disregarded and you are faced with being guilty on mere accusations and manipulation.

 

[Pacific16]

Sadly it’s affecting a lot of us. There is absolutely no evidence at all beyond the children’s voice, but this has all been taken at face value. They have drawn pictures with the social worker of mum’s house and dad’s house, and written that they hate everything and everyone in dad’s home, whereas mum’s is amazing, happy…”dad not allowed in!!”

I have over 300 photos and videos that I have compiled to show how happy the children are with me and family, that take is right up to the day mum phoned the police. I am hoping to show that their rejection of dad is extreme and disproportionate compared to their actual reality, which I believe is a major red flag of PA. They also repeat her adult language…another red flag.

And to stress again, all the school safeguarding records state how I have concerns for their emotions al wellbeing and appeals and instigated professional expert support as such. I just don’t get why the social worker has overlooked all of that and remains adamant that I am abusing the boys.

My understanding is that the symptoms of abuse, and symptoms of parental alienation are the same, and therefore why has a social worker fallen on the side of abuse, without any consideration of alienation?

I am at a loss and praying a solicitor, barrister will pull apart the report, and the judge who has overseen the case for 7 years will question the allegations, given she’s made them before, the judge dismissed them all, and mum kept applying to reduce the boys time with me. I’ve only ever asked for 50/50.

Throw in I am the keynote lecturer on safeguarding at the most prestigious teacher training uni in the UK, and lecture on emotion coaching, how is all of this being missed?!?!